The only thing in the sports world worth talking about this month (and for years to come) is Guilherme Marchi’s 600th ride on the Built Ford Tough Series—for several reasons.

He was the 2008 PBR World Champion—a long time ago, in bull rider years. A lot of the guys he rode against are retired now—not Guilherme.

A few years ago he was seriously thinking about retiring and going back to Brazil.

He didn’t.

When his marriage fell apart, he let people know how he felt. He didn’t pretend to be some superhuman beast without feelings. His riding stunk for a while. He’s human.

Marchi said 2015 was the worst year of his career. His bull in Thackerville stumbled, gave him a shot in the knee, and tore his MCL and PCL. Marchi was out for 1/3 of the season with his knee injury and needed surgery. During the year he got divorced, he had to sit out the Finals because of his knees and bicep surgery. Lots of rehab exercises. “But let’s see what God has planned for me,” he said optimistically.

He could have decided he was done; being 30 makes you an old man (again, in bull rider years), and he didn’t have anything left to prove.

Instead he really cowboyed up—in the best sense of the word. He doubled down on his fitness regime, rededicated himself to the sport, and came out swinging. It was just so improbable, and a lot of people expected his burst of energy and determination to be short-lived. Ha.

In the “Fearless” Netflix mini-series, Marchi said, “I have always told my mother and father I want to die inside the arena, doing what I love most in my life, which is bullriding… Die happy.” I can understand the fantasy, but it made me want to kill him. It’s the kind of thing a teenager says. He has kids. Not so happy for them if he died in the arena.

I can watch that video of his 600th ride and his jubilation afterward, over and over. You can see it not only on the PBR website, but also on RFD-TV and on the KURL website: http://www.kulr8.com/story/35104956/guilherme-marchi-makes-history-with-600-career-rides-round-2-of-stanley-performance-in-action-invitational. KURL’s photo says it all–and I can’t reproduce it here, for copyright reasons.

Also, because I don’t know how.

Here’s what Guilherme said on RFD-TV:

“I need to be proud for myself for everything, for be 34 years old and still ride good – like 50%. [Note: 56.07%  is the exact figure for his career so far.] Spend a lot of time work out, to get on bulls, a lot of preparation myself to be here, to stay strong and still compete with the best bull riders in the world. I wish I never stop, I wish I still doing good for the rest of my life, but pretty soon I need find another job or do something different, but for the beginning through now, everything I did, I did it with my heart, my blood. Never give up. I try my best…But it’s not easy, because we compete with the best in the world.”

I don’t know what other job you do after being one of the best bull riders in the world, but I’m pretty sure that whatever he does, Marchi will do it with his whole heart.

Parabéns, Guilherme! Nós te amamos!

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Big news! Mauney to retire! Nunes and DeOliveira making comebacks!

April Fool!



This is more like a stream-of-consciousness rendering of the rest of the Iron Cowboy event.

Round 2

Of course the lead-in to the CBS broadcast has to include 2012 Iron Cowboy, J.B. Mauney, as if he’s about to win the event. Never mind João Ricardo Vieira, who won it twice (2014 and 2015). They also commented on Jess Lockwood not being here–because those are the only two guys who count: The Great White Hope and his anointed successor. Keep hoping, PBR bosses, because I don’t think it’s gonna happen.

Pay attention to Claudio Montanha, Jr. instead. And Cody Teel, former PRCA and CBR champion. He even beat Sage Steele Kimzey, which is just about impossible to do.

Aaaand of course the first interview is with J.B. Leah Garcia, still searching for elusive words of wisdom from the Fan Favorite, gets this: “Stay on. That’s the name of the game here. Make the whistle.” “Stay on. That’s my job, the rest will take care of itself.” SO profound. OY. And I am so sick of that fake humility.

“My attitude was to try to be first every time.” –Ty Murray. As opposed to all those other guys who try to be second every time.

Thank god Chase Outlaw shaved. It makes him a little less difficult to look at.  Gotta give him props for that round 1 ride on Buckeye Bill, though: worth the 88.25.

João Ricardo Vieira drew Brutus; unlucky for him. The first jump set him up for failure. “It only took one up, and JRV was the one down.”—Craig Hummer accurately (for a change) describing this unpleasant out. 45 for the bull. BTW did you know that Vieira “lightly slammed” his bull rope against the out gate in Kansas City? I never knew you could lightly slam something. Another chuckle, courtesy of Justin Felisko, PBR scribe.

For the 3rd week in a row, Eduardo Aparecido has drawn Jack Shot. Tell me that’s an accident. “He just keeps making bull rider moves”—Ty Murray, reaching the pinnacle of insight. 90.50 for a great ride.

Spotted Demon turned Wallace de Oliveira into a helicopter. This is the bull that tanked Guilherme Marchi for a while.

Claudio Montana, Jr. looked good on Bad Beagle, a Jared Allen bull. Montana won the PBR Brazil title and debuted in Kansas City last week, impressing everybody. This time: Aww! He looked like he had a lock on that bull—WTF happened at 6.71? He landed in a backward somersault, on his head. The Booth Boys think he lifted his leg too soon; he was overconfident. I guess that’s better than being underconfident, but neither attitude helps.

Freak of Nature’s trip down the rail would’ve been a re-ride, but Reese Cates got bucked off; another backwards somersault, landing on his head. He challenged the call, but didn’t prevail. There may have been a little irregularity at the chute, but not enough for the judges to think he was fouled.

Fabiano got Red Rover to come over. (Ha!) “If you’re riding a bull easy, don’t make it hard,” was Justin McBride’s assessment of what Vieira does: he keeps VSage Steele Kimzey, it simple. True dat. Score: 86.50. They were so eager to get to JB’s ride, they didn’t bother to announce Vieira’s score. You have to look for it, or listen hard to the arena announcer, who usually tells the crowd the score. Come on, Booth Boys—do your job. Stop licking JB’s boots for a while.

They were babbling that JB’s the best at riding rank bulls (EVER, I suppose), but Mystical bucked him off in NYC last month. This time the bull fell down, and JB got bucked off at 7.61, in an impressive flying dismount. He challenged the no-score, and received a re-ride option. He had made every possible effort to stay on, even without a rope in his hand—which of course would automatically be a no-score. The re-ride was offered because the bull hipped himself, causing him to fall down. The weird thing is that the bull’s action didn’t stop—now there’s a bovine who knows his job!

Shane Proctor, last year’s Iron Cowboy, prepares his own food and brings it on the road to keep the 10 lbs. he lost at bay. I’m curious what a bullrider healthy meal is. He could tout this as a new weight-loss plan. Anyway, Hey Jack scored 44.50 off him.

Rubens Barbosa, world #2, took on Stone Sober. “To be a special bull, they have to be a little freaky in their head” was Ty’s analysis. “The more psychotic they are in their head, the more athletic ability you see come out of them.” I don’t know; I don’t think Bushwacker was a mental case; he was just really smart and ridiculously athletic. Barbosa, however, had no chance. The bull came out backwards with a big jump. Or would that be a kick?

So now Eduardo and Fabiano are #1 and #2 in the event.

JB’s re-ride was Naughty List.  “He [JB] really is a freak of nature. He’s never worked out a day in his life. He’s got that Gumby kind of body.”—Ty, revealing his age– and mine, since I know who Gumby is—and it ain’t from watching Eddie Murphy play him on Saturday Night Live. (“I’m Gumby, dammit!”) “But there will be no fairy-tale ending on this occasion,” intones Hummer about the result of the match. That’s because the judges didn’t get to write the script this time.

Supposedly this is the biggest house of the year, according to Craig. I really wanted a pan of the stands to see if there are empty seats, because when they say things like this, there usually are.

Luciano de Castro, 20, made it to 5.26  on Air Time, who is also a freak, according to Ty. 45.25  bull score.

Mason Lowe on Smooth Operator, for 90.75, moves to the lead. That’s a .25 ding for Eduardo. Now, do we really believe Mason’s ride was better? Or was it the bull? Nope; both bulls scored 44.75. So…

Cody Teel, who rode in the previous round, had to take on Bruiser, helping the bull to a 46.

Oh, god; another Bad Boy “Mow with an attitude” spokesfloozy. Could somebody explain to me what exactly that attitude is? “I’m gonna grind this grass into the ground! Yeah! I’m gonna cut it till it bleeds!”? Very attractive.

Round 3

Fabiano on Honey Hush made an unbelievable recovery from being out of position tilting on the right side of the bull. 88.50

Aparecido pulled Big Black Cat, “a very rider-friendly bull,” per Craig. Eduardo rode him (the bull, not Hummer) away from his hand. 88.75

Mason Lowe on Fire and Smoke looked like a lock, but arrgh! 44 for the bull.

“And then there were two: the Brazilians will move on.”—Hummer being a jerk and emphasizing nationality. Would he ever say, “Two Americans will move on”?

I’m loving the Cooper Tires commercial, and now it’s gonna be stuck in my head. “Cooper tires on the ground go round and round…”

Round 4

Fabiano had to tackle Cochise, who has beaten him twice. Vieira naturally was put OTC. I think he wasn’t set before he had to nod; he didn’t look happy coming out of the chute. The result was equally unhappy.

Eduardo rode Catfish John, to win the event. Score? The Booth Boys don’t bother to tell us. 89, I found out. Aparecido pulled himself back up when he was out of position tilting on the side of the bull. He’s now #1 in the world.  Of course Leah asked him a question he didn’t know how to answer (as she does with many people). At least this question didn’t have three dependent clauses.

About the money: somebody please ‘splain: A Feb. 15 story on the PBR website says, “The Iron Cowboy event winner will receive a total of $100,000, including $50,000 from Bad Boy Mowers as part of the Bad Boy Mowers Major Bonus Program, providing $200,000 over the course of the four PBR Majors this season.” Aparecido won $138,766.67, according to the PBR website. What an oddball number. Does that mean, after taxes? To make it more confusing, in a photo on the PBR website, Aparecido is standing between two $50,000 checks. (Last year, winner Shane Proctor took home $115,625—another oddball number.) Does anyone understand this math? Please let us all know!

The deciding factor in Fabiano’s and Eduardo’s successful rides: the guys pulled themselves back up to center when they were out of position; they were willing themselves to win—and they have the core strength to do it. Odds are that most riders would let themselves get bucked off at that point.

It was fun to see a pack of Eduardo’s “compatriots” flinging him up in the air. Cute! I’m sure bull riders don’t think  of themselves as cute, but they were; it was like seeing a bunch of kids win a ball game.

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Since I’ve been focused on other things the past couple of months, I thought I’d crank out this one right away, instead of dragging myself (and you) through something that happened a week (or more) ago.


“Two-time world Champion JB Mauney is placed among the greats” is the first thing we hear. “Can the “Mauney Making Moments” begin here (or whatever the rest of that stupid sentence was)?” The voiceover spewed all this garbage hype about the PBR’s favorite–regardless of the fact that Mauney’s #15 out of the 15 riders here. God forbid the PBR should do the same hype for 3-time (I mean 4) World Champion Silvano Alves! “Uncharacteristically first out of the gate,” Craig Hummer dissembles, trying to put a spin on the fact that Mauney is at the bottom of this particular pile. The PBR is never going to give you reality. They’ll say anything to keep up the pretense that Mauney is still on top—which he hasn’t been so far this season, in case anyone’s interested in the truth.

And after all the Hummer-McBride gabbling about how JB is going to make up for his performance last time (1 for 3 in Anaheim), he’s bucked off in a second and change, by Wired Child, who scores a 44. He sure looked bummed, but I don’t care anymore. And as if we don’t get enough of JB, now we have to see him in commercials—two in a row, no less. (Wrangler & the PBR shop)


Guilherme Marchi got hurt at last week’s Championship Round in Anaheim, and I’m glad I wasn’t there. Seeing it in replay was bad enough. He hit his head, then got stepped on so badly, on his lower back, that he was knocked unconscious. That’s the first time I’ve ever seen this happen to him; it was frightening to see this strong guy flat out on his stomach in the dirt. (It was the same horrifying situation years ago at Mohegan Sun, when Validiron de Oliveira was knocked out; seeing that big strong guy not moving scared the crap out of everyone.) Marchi got a concussion, so he wasn’t competing today.  It looks like the PBR is being more cautious about clearing concussed cowboys to ride, after  all the publicity about Ty Pozzobon’s death. BTW, if you haven’t read it, Maclean’s magazine, from Canada, did an excellent job of examining Ty’s situation. Tanner Byrne in particular gave information we wouldn’t have known if it weren’t for writer Charlie Gillis.  The only thing Gillis did wrong was calling Pozzobon a “rodeo star.” As the old PBR slogan said, “This is not a rodeo!” Here’s the link to the article:  http://www.macleans.ca/sports/with-a-stars-death-rodeo-meets-its-nfl-moment/


  • Stone Sober vs. Matt Triplett: The bull’s first move, almost right there in the chute, was a kick at the ceiling. Bye-bye Matt.
  • Ryan Dirtwater on Deep Water: “This bull can be special, but also sometimes a little ordinary”?? Justin, what?? The bull crashed himself sideways across the gate just after exiting; he was in a damned hurry. Ryan was flung off, and then got stomped. He’s offered a re-ride, but if you need to be helped off the dirt, maybe taking a re-ride isn’t such a good idea.
  • Mason Lowe made it almost to 5 seconds on Cochise, which is miraculous, considering what a monster that bull is.
  • Cooper Davis went flying off Hey Jack almost immediately out of the gate. 44.25 for the bull.
  • Dener Barbosa had the misfortune to get on Seven Dust (who, BTW, made his entrance in a cloud of dust). Barbosa bailed; he knew it wasn’t going to get better. Bull score: 44.50
  • Smooth Operator rolled to one side, rocked to the other, and Mike Lee became acquainted with the dirt.
  • Shane Proctor, who has a 33.33% riding percentage, got on Honey Hush, but I guess losing those few pounds didn’t help him stay on.
  • BULLETIN! Fabiano Vieira was not  OTC! Made it to 6.04  on Brutus. Another 44.50 bull score.
  • Ryan Dirteater’s Little Red Jacket re-ride was also a major ouchie: this time he got thrown against the bucking chute, then landed hard on his right hip. The list of his major injuries is horrendous. He couldn’t get up off the ground without help from Sports Medicine. Meanwhile, the bull kept spinning like a coked-up top.
  • Eduardo Aparecido met up again with Jack Shot, and the bull won the rematch. Another 44.50 score.
  • Kaique Pacheco, #5 in the world, got on Moto Moto “in great position to move the momentum over to the right,” Craig babbled. Oh, for Christ’s sake, Hummer, learn the English language! What on earth are you trying to say?? I guess all Kaique’s fidgeting in the chute while OTC was necessary. He really was determined on that bull, keeping his eyes on the hump. The score was 86.75; the bull’s was 44.25.

ANNOYING: Craig generalizing about how all the Brazilians study every bull they’re going to get on.

  • Derek “the Kolbaba Kid”—one of those fake nicknames Craig invents and tries to make stick—made a Mike-Lee-worthy plop! when Mystical made him hit the ground. 44 for the bull.
  • Marco Eguchi, with a 62.50% riding percentage, got on Bruiser, last year’s World Champion Bull. Damn, after all that announcer talk about what a good matchup it is, Marco was history after one rotation by the big boy. 45 for Bruiser.
  • Pearl Harbor, who came in at 21/23, literally flew in mid-air out of the gate. Rubens Barbosa looked like he was going to ride, which would have been impressive, but Aww! he came off. 46.25 for P.H., making his stat 21/24.
  • Jess Lockwood has a 57.89% riding percentage, but had to face Long John. “That’s how JB Mauney has made a [something-or-other] in the PBR: by riding the unrideable bulls,” says Justin McBride (apropos of nothing). Let me clarify something here: if a bull is unrideable, that means nobody can ride him, period. If you want to say “nearly unrideable,” then you can say that JB rode him. And so did JW Harris, and Nathan Schaper, and Guilherme Marchi, and Douglas Duncan. As Lockwood was in the chute, we had to endure a lotta hype from the Booth Boys, while there was a lotta prep from the kid (and you know they’re never gonna put Jess OTC), and a harsh buckoff—with  a stomp from a hoof on his leg. 45.25 goes to Long John. I’m feeling sorry for Jess already; the PBR hype machine has decided he’s the Next Great White Hope, and already have him posing for boy-band type publicity shots. Don’t listen to them, Jess! Stay sweet!
  •  Kaique Pacheco wins, with the only ride of the night. (The bull power here was exceptional. Scary exceptional.) Being interviewed afterward, Pacheco looks so freakin’ calm, it makes me laugh. Props to Leah Garcia for pointing out that Kaique is the World back-to-back Reserve Champion. His comment: “I’m good, but a little sore, my leg.”


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This is an experiment

This is an experiment: Let the cowboys do the talking.

But first:

I love that the bulls’ outs during the regular season will now count toward the World Champion Bull title. I feel vindicated, after talking about this every year, saying how unfair it is that a bull who’s done well all year should be judged on two outs at the end. A bad day means losing the title. This is a much fairer system—and I’m sure the contractors are happy, too. Thanks, PBR!

From the last day in Chicago:

Stetson Lawrence almost lost it on Soldier’s Pride, but managed to move his arm into the right place after some flailing. Scored an 84, but it wasn’t for the glory: “I just didn’t want to get hit by those big horns, so I just tried my butt off.”

Guilherme Marchi’s dismount from Cracker Jack was pretty unorthodox: he came off the bull, flew through the air, then stuck to the gate. Leah Garcia asked him, “What do you call that dismount?” “Spiderman,” he says with a big grin.

Brady Sims was on Ante Up for what seemed like a long 8 seconds. When the bull changed directions, Sims practically sat on his riding hand to stay in place. Score: 85.75. Justin McBride explained Brady’s strategy: “It’s all about gettin’ in the middle.”

In the Championship Round, Ryan Dirteater again picked After Party as his dancing partner. Ryan has ridden him 5 out of 7 times. Asked why he chose the same bull, Ryan delivered the only sensible answer: “Why wouldn’t I pick him?”

In the chute, Wicked Stick was poking his nose through the gate, sizing up the arena while Marchi was getting prepped. Marchi was hanging on sideways near the end of ride #585, but after he scored his 83.25, he told Leah: “Never give up—I try, try until the end.”

Jess Lockwood, who with a 71+% riding percentage is too good to be true, took on Modified Clyde for 81.25. He fought like crazy to hang on, even riding sideways toward the end. His evaluation of the ride: “That was awful.”

Brady Sims: “Them bulls in the short round buck too hard to make a mistake.”


Dennis the Menace was a pogo stick, bopping all over the arena, getting right up to the fence. Matt Triplett ended up on his feet, though. He turned down the re-ride, and didn’t really have an explanation for why, but nobody gave him crap about it. “That’s his decision,” said one of the usually tart-tongued commentators. But when Silvano Alves turns down a re-ride, we never hear the end of it, and they insult him six ways to Sunday.

The commentators remarked that all the Brazilians were taking language lessons because “there was a little bit of a language barrier.” God forbid the PBR should fork out for a translator!


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About Chicago, Saturday, Jan. 14—

A note about Ty Pozzobon: congratulations to the PBR for handling his death in a sensitive manner. The photos were carefully curated to highlight his ability and not the wrecks, and they let the riders speak for themselves. It was very touching to see J.W. Harris and other riders wearing patches with “Pozzy 23” on them– his rider number. And kudos to the Pozzobon family for making a difficult decision for the ultimate good of bull riders (all athletes, actually) and the sport. They must be exceptional people.

About Chicago, Saturday, Jan. 14—

Remember when I used to say that the PBR should hook up with rock music, because bullriders are the new rock stars? Every time I see Steve Tyler in his cowboy getup screaming, I slap myself. What they REALLY need to do is get hold of John Fogerty! The guy has actually been on a horse.


The judges didn’t put Silvano Alves on the clock! They did, however, give him his usual score: 84.50, for his ride on Dirty Vegas. Some things never change.


Guilherme Marchi is launching his own merchandising with tee shirts and hats. Good for him! If the PBR won’t do it, do it yourself! I’m buying.


  • Thank god Hummer shaved–he was not rocking that scuzzy look last weekend.
  • That’s not dirt on the ground. It’s crushed limestone trucked in. I seem to remember that stuff giving bulls a lot of trouble in the past.
  • Somebody PLEASE tell Craig Hummer that the word is “ee-vent,” not “uh-vent.” And the expression is, “a whole other,” not “a whole nother.” There is no such word as “nother.”
  • Why is it always “this Brazilian”?? I have yet to hear, “this American”!!
  • Who was the doofus wobbling Stetson Lawrence’s helmeted head around as he was sitting on his bull? Don’t joggle the brain anymore than it’s going to get joggled in the next 8 seconds! Have you learned nothing??
  • They could have spared us the revolting display of hype: clips of JB Mauney riding and Hummer getting all excited. JB’s not even here.
  • Eek! Somewhere in here, Hummer called Adriano Moraes “Adriano Morales.” Because all those foreign names sound alike, Charlie Humus.


  • According to Craig Hummer, Cooper Davis needs to “re-coop the fire.” Um, if you put a fire in a chicken coop, you’re gonna have a lot of barbecued poultry.
  • Another gem from he-who-knoweth-not-whereof-he-speaks: “Derek Kolbaba finds a way to dominate the potpourri of power!” I think maybe Craig doesn’t know that dried up rose petals, lavender, and cinnamon doesn’t really pack a hell of a wallop.
  • Wow, dude, what are you drinking?? Hummer called Jess Lockwood and Cooper Davis “Titans” of the sport! Jess is 19 and has been on the BFTS for about 5 minutes, and Cooper Davis is okay, but seriously…

BULLS OF THE NIGHT (IMO, for silly reasons)

  • Stormy Wing’s bull, Blue Magic, because he looks like chocolate chip ice cream.
  • Lieutenant Dan, who performed a series of sideways jumps followed by popping up into the air; Dan did just what he had to do to get rid of Cooper Davis, then immediately clocked out and stood there. Gotta love a bovine who knows when it’s Miller Time.


  • Once in a blue moon, the judges damp down the favoritism: Rubens Barbosa (one of the few cowboys who actually looks good in a beard) led from beginning to end, with his 88.75 on Little Joe (a re-match from last year in Phoenix). That bull really jerked on his arm and made Barbosa work for it, he did oblige Rubens by eventually turning into his hand.
  • Good show by Cody Heffernan on Cracker Jack, for 85.75 The getoff could have been disastrous, though, if Cody hadn’t known how to do a backwards somersault (away from the bull).
  • Reese Cates was in the event as an alternate, on Red Sails in the Sunset (a re-match from a Touring Pro event). Did not go well. Or as Hummer put it (though we wish he hadn’t), “Red Sails in the Sunset puts another red mark on Reese Cates’s weekend.”
  • Watching Gage Gay on Sledge Hammer, I’m chanting, “Head down, head down, head down!” Gay did not listen.
  • Paolo Lima Made it look easy on Legal Tender, a muley, for 83.50.
  • Stetson Lawrence scored 83.50 on Dirt Road, capped with a nice getoff on his feet.
  • Nice style, boy! Alex Cardozo conquered Ram It, for 87.
  • Marco Eguchi’s still got his elbow braced. Precious Air didn’t know what the hell he was doing. He’d pop into the air, then just almost walk in a circle. Re-ride flags rained. With a choice of 68.75 or a re-ride Eguchi settled for the crappy score. His arm must be hurting.
  • Keyshawn Whitehorse, may have overdone it on Upper Class. Justin McBride made a good point: the kid is too fired up about being on the BFTS; he needs to calm down, because he can ride bulls.
  • Mason Lowe’s ride on Dew Rag Dan resulted in a hard getoff on his sacroiliac, and 85.25 points.
  • Justin Paton handled Slick Rick, for 84. Nothing exciting going on there, but it’s nice to have more Ozzies on tour.
  • Brady Sims took on Bad Moon Rising, struggling at the end. He held on to the last, kept hold of the rope as he was heading down, and came up with 85.50. His strategy: “You gotta keep staring at their back and keep fighting for the middle.” Pretty much.
  • Spiderman on Set ‘Em Up Joe let go just a hair before 8–at 7.85. Afterward, he went down on one knee, something obviously wrong, and was helped out. No follow-up from the announcers, however. That would happen only if it were JB Mauney.
  • Tequila Sunrise rattledthe chute so much, the camera shook. Whitehorse was holding onto Cody Nance to keep him from getting bashed against the chute. Very nice of him! No ride here.
  • Derek Kolbaba took Stinger for an 84.25 ride, showing what he could do when he opened up and whacked away. He had been on a bad streak before – 24 buckoffs. I note that Kolbaba is carrying on the proud tradition of Austin Meier Hat Hair.
  • Mouse Trap kept sitting down in the chute. Maybe he was scared of who was on his back: J.W. Harris. He was so uncooperative that J.W. had to re-set, while Matt Triplett went out and scored 85.25 on Lip Trick. Naturally Hummer had one in the chamber: “Matt Triplett able to pay a little bit more than lip service.”
  • Back to Harris: Mouse Trap started to run away with him; Harris touched him, then went to the dirt. If he hadn’t, I’m pretty sure that would have been a re-ride situation.
  • Dener Barbosa (put on the clock—the rule is, you must do that to at least one Brazilian rider per round), tried it out on Buckeye Bill, and got slammed to the dirt on his back. Can you say, OOF!? He has a shoulder injury, which McBride thought may have accounted for the incorrect positioning of his free arm.
  • Nathan Schaper – “He’s the kind of guy that you want to marry your daughter,” Shorty opined, in the course of a digression that boiled down to, Nathan’s too nice to ride aggressively. On Full Throttle, Schaper bobbled all over the bull’s back, not helping the cause.
  • Shane Proctor rode Grave Digger for 83.50, but the bull was kinda boring.
  • Ryan Dirteater, who’s on a 11/13 hot streak, didn’t have a good visit from the Tooth Fairy. The sneaky bull changed direction just as Ryan was getting too comfortable, and Dirteater came down at 7.92 Someone challenged on his behalf, but it was no good.
  • I still don’t get why they call Eduardo Aparecido “Fast Eddie.” Anyway, Rocco bucked him off, then gave him a big ol’ love tap with his head on the way out.
  • Guilherme Marchi is now at 583 qualified rides, having made one in Round 1. All his prep on Spinning Money didn’t add to his total, though. Marchi thought the bull would spin to the right, and the bull went to the left.
  • I thought I heard someone say Kaique Pacheco made 52 qualified rides last year? The Joker, a new bull, was rocking his head up repeatedly in the chute. The stupid bull cost Pacheco a good score; he doesn’t know what he’s doing. In spite of the 79.75 score, Kaique declined a re-ride.
  • João Ricardo Vieira has to thank Northside, who started out turning away from Vieira’s hand, then turned into it, for 82.25.
  • Jess Lockwood, who is already in the PBR’s “next JB” pipeline, didn’t score on Swashbuckler, who scored a very respectable 44, second only to Red sails in the Sunset’s 44.25.

All in all, the cowboys did themselves proud: 15 rides.


Posted in Built Ford Tough Series, Bull Riding, cowboys, PBR | 4 Comments




New introduction process—the riders’ photos are shown projected on the dirt. Neat trick!


  • That new blonde commentator needs to dial it back a notch. Way too enthused.
  • OMG–George Thorogood singing “Bad to the Bone.” This was a whole setup for Mauney’s entrance! For a minute there, I thought they were going to have J.B. lowered from the heavens. Uh, excuse me, he is NOT the #1 rider–he is #3! The PBR will look for any possible way to deify him! They are SO invested in having him “win” the world championship from Kaique Pacheco, they’re spending god knows how much in airtime to promote their boy. If any other sport favored one player like this, people would be crying “Foul!” all over the place. And while I’m at it: does anyone listen to the lyrics to that song? Does anyone think the character described in that song is a good example of “the cowboy way”? For that matter, does anyone who knows about J.B.’s private life and the way he treats women think that he’s the epitome of a cowboy? Get real!

Then they interview JB instead of Pacheco (#1) or Cooper Davis (#2)! How much more favoritism could you possibly show? How much disrespect can you possibly dish out to the other riders??

  • What a bunch of guff from Ty about the judges’ tough job and all their training, and how it’s a thankless job. Yeah, I’ll bet JB is thanking them. Whatever “training” they’ve had sure goes out the window when they‘re judging certain Brazilian riders. One in particular.
  • ABBI young bulls are featured this night. Some of them are definitely not ready for prime time.
  • The “Hitch’d” segment was not worth talking about. Or watching.
  • The stock contractors’ segment is always interesting. Jeff Robinson told the invisible interviewer, “Treat them like you would any athlete.” H.D. Page talked about getting the bulls’ trust and then teaching them their jobs.
  • Hummer of course started talking about J.B. Mauney as “a man who not only wants it, but wants it every time.” As if only the great god Mauney does—not the rest of the riders working their asses off.


Ty Murray was talking about Robson Palermo getting near the end of his career. “One of the best ever,” Craig Hummer had the grace to say. Robson’s attempt at riding Smokin’ Gun was disastrous. And boy, was Robson pissed. I’ve never seen him react to a buckoff like that.


  • Lachlan Richardson took a loud pop from Cracker Breaker after both legs flew up behind him. (Lachlan’s, not the bull’s, should you be trying to picture that.) Richardson challenged his 7.97 time, but he had touched that bull.
  • Frequent Flyer tried to fly up out of the chute. Says Craig, “Wallace de Oliveira is not going to be able to cash in any miles on Frequent Flyer.” How could you not see that line coming?
  • Rebel Yell 2 just did too many backbends for Nevada Newman to handle.
  • Emilio Resende on After Midnight was another fast buckoff. “Resende is going to have to set his alarm clock for a different time,” Hummer said, which makes no sense to me, but what else is new? The bull hipped himself, though, so Resende was offered a re-ride.
  • Uncle Fester was one wild jumping bull. “Stormy Wing takes a knock to the noggin, and he might be seeing the whole Addams family after that one.” Didja ever notice how Craig’s train of what is loosely termed “thought” becomes more and more derailed by the time they get to the Finals?
  • Locked and Loaded stomped and yanked and crushed and trampled Aaron Roy – it took the bullfighters forever to get Roy out of there, and he was left trashed on the dirt. No one’s body should bend in that position. It also took them a long time to get him strapped on the backboard and carried out. Even Motormouth Ty and The Bummer were almost lost for words. Almost. It was one of the worst wrecks to see, especially since Roy already had a wreck that almost paralyzed him.
  • Finally there was a real ride: Tyler Harr on Flattop Pete (who was 1 for 10), for 83.75
  • “Wicked Stick didn’t need a wicked first move,” Hummer babbled. “Gage Gay leaned back right away.” A lot of guys seem to be leaning back too far.
  • Again Ty calls Valdiron de Oliveira “a freak of nature,” because the guy is 37 and has ridden 28 of his last 56 bulls. Smooth Over was a pogo stick, but Valdiron scored 84. More pushups.
  • Report on Aaron Roy: he had a right femur fracture and will have surgery tonight. I just don’t totally believe that was his only injury.
  • Ty Pozzobon drew J.W. Hart’s bull, Glory Days. McBride said J.W. thinks Justin’s a jinx. Ty handled the direction change very well, and blew off the bull’s back in a twirl right at the buzzer. He did this with an injured riding hand. Hart was not happy with the bull’s share of the 84.25 score. Craig reminded him that McBride is a jinx.
  • Dener Barbosa, who’s ridden 60 out of 66 bulls in Brazil, couldn’t stay on Hustle Man.
  • Losing My Religion was a very righteous bull, but I’m sure Zane Cook wasn’t feeling too sanctified on that one. (Do I sound like Craig yet?)
  • Derek Kolbaba’s trip on Cut the Cord looked like it would be a ride, but Kolbaba lost his balance.
  • CanadianDakotaButtar, who qualified for the BFTS, coming in at #35, based on his BlueDEF tour performance, took on Deep Water. Ty Murray: “For these young bulls, it’s a sensory overload in here.” Yeah, and for a lot of us viewers, too. “Didn’t take long for Deep Water to put Dakota Buttar in the deep end,” was the Craig comment.
  • Mason Lowe’s Lifting Lives was another bull throwing himself forward in the chute. Lowe gets to rewrap. Little quirky bull; I like it. Mason didn’t.
  • Neil Holmes on Bottoms Up was “able to keep his bottom down,” per Craig, until 7.94 when he apparently slapped the bull. On the replay, he lost .88. How is that even possible?? I wish Neil was miked, because he had something to say!
  • The Athlete Profile made me very happy, because it was about Tanner Byrne. Video clip: “You all right, bro?” Jesse Byrne asked his brother as soon as Tanner completed a ride. Jesse looked as happy as Tanner did. That’s the thing about those guys. How can you not love them? Tanner was not having a good time tonight, though. Handsome Jeff gradually worked him off the right side.
  • Cody Nance somehow rode Wired Crazy, resulting in an 85.25 and a neckerchief toss from the top rail. It’s such an artificial, manufactured move. He just doesn’t have a natural end zone dance.
  • “Kasey Hayes,” said Craig, “was his own form of dragon slayer.” Finally, an American was put on the clock. Hayes took so long on Red Rocket’s back, he was disqualified. “The victim of his own preparation, or lack thereof,” was how Hummer characterized it. I don’t get it. If you know the clock is counting down, and the bull isn’t going to cooperate, just nod, and if the bull won’t come out of the chute, it’s his fault, not yours, and you should get a re-ride, right? Words of wisdom from Hummer: “The first person you want to talk to after doing something like that is not Cody Lambert.”
  • Nathan Schaper came in second in the BlueDEF Finals. I liked the story about him putting family first: he went to his sister’s wedding instead of the last regular season BlueDEF event, then got it together for those Finals and this one. (Another reason to like Nathan.) Crunch Time gave him a hard time in the chute. “It didn’t take a ton of fire to best Crunch Time, but Nathan Schaper’s candle has blown out” was Craig’s mystifying comment. I can’t even…
  • Another not-subtle Lambert dirty ha-ha: Native American Stetson Lawrence was matched with Red Dawn (red—get it?). The bull did some weird skipping thing that threw him. Again the challenge button went off for no reason.
  • Chase Outlaw surprised everyone with his excellent ride on Air Marshal. 89.50 for him, 43.50 for the bull. “I’m happier than a gopher in fresh dirt,” was the highlight of his interview with Leah Garcia.
  • Guilherme Marchi, gunning for his 577th ride, got worked off to the side of Polar Vortex, who went away from his hand. He is so not happy.
  • Paolo Lima had no luck on Burn it Down, though at least he wasn’t put on the clock. Predictable Hummerism: “Burn it Down is able to burn through the Brazilian quickly.” The bull was pretty steep.
  • Shane Proctor had just a bad out all around on Swamp Wreck. He looked like he didn’t even know how to ride bulls, which is definitely not the case.
  • On Aristokat, Mike Lee was moving faster than the bull. “Able to turn Mike Lee into a human kite,” Craig came up with. Again, I have no idea how this man’s mind works.
  • Hummer says Ryan Dirteater is one of the calmer guys he talks to in the locker room. Dirteater has a whole routine of strapping on various braces. He, too was put on the clock. Were these judges in a hurry to get to the bar or something? At 8 seconds, Ryan went helicoptering off High Test. The ride was reviewed to check whether his elbow had contacted the bull before 8, but it did not. 86.75 and I did a little happy dance.
  • Fabiano Vieira (#7 in the world) pulled an 84.50 out of All Nighter, even with that crooked free arm.
  • Eduardo Aparecido (#6 in the world) scored 85 on Sketchy Bob, a pretty good bull that I could swear was on another circuit; he’s pretty rideable.
  • Jess Lockwood (#5 in the world) has a 48.08 riding percentage, and is leading the rookie race by 1,000 points. Awww! Buckoff. 44.50 for Acting Crazy was the result.
  • João Ricardo Vieira on Rocco was aggravating. McBride was right: Vieira handled the bull just fine to the left into his hand, but when it turned back to the right—fooey. I don’t know why Vieira bothered to challenge; he didn’t make 8; his time was 7.89. That bull was excellent but was awarded only 42.50.
  • Mauney took on Valedictorian. More worshipful shit-slinging by Ty and Hummer. “Start your engines, ladies and gentlemen. J.B. Mauney crosses swords with Valedictorian, as well as sends a message to Davis and Pacheco.” I don’t know what the hell Hummer was talking about here, but clearly J.B. makes Craig’s engine race. As for crossing swords, methinks Hummer may have confused the head of the class with some non-existent Roman emperor. For once, the score was reasonable: 85.75 instead of 95.75. Shocker!
  • I have to admit, Cooper Davis is unflappable. He rode Show Kitty for 87.50; no fuss, no muss, no bother.


  • Silvano Alves has a riding percentage of 41+. He was immediately put on the clock, of course. Clearly the judges’ “training” included The Alves Clause: always put Silvano on the clock, no matter what. Wedding Crasher was a pretty dopey bull; definitely worth a re-ride, but Alves was happy to keep his 63 score. His attitude: this is only the first day.
  • Another one’s on the clock: Rubens Barbosa, prepping on Udder Lover. J.W. was helping to get the bull to stop leaning, so Barbosa could get a fair shot. The bull sticking his nose out through the gate made quite the pretty picture. A closeup of that drooling muzzle would’ve been just the thing for a Cody Lambert Christmas card.
  • Juliano Da Silva, who was at the Finals because of his work on the BlueDEF tour, was also put on the clock. Flight Plan was not a good match for him. “Flight Plan causes liftoff,” Hummer announced. Rider and bull were kicking up a huge dust cloud; it was very impressive, and I hope Andy Watson caught a still photo. Somebody hit the challenge button before the ride was over, though. Ty Murray landing a good one: “With J.W., the dirt was usually comin’ offa him, not the bull.”
  • Judges’ training manual: ‘It’s Marco Eguchi in the chute. Another Brazilian. Put him on the clock.’ Killing Time was a wild bull, scooping his front end down on the dirt. It worked to get rid of Eguchi.
  • Emilio Resende, on his re-ride, Jack Shot: on the clock. He could’ve ridden that bull, but then got leaned back. “You cannot ride what you cannot see,” was how Justin McBride put it. Yup. Hummer joked about McBride filling in for Ty Murray when he took his “union-mandated” break. Ty told on himself: “I can say the same thing only so many times a night.” Oh, we agree with you, Ty; we really do. Try to decrease the frequency, will you?
  • “He seems more like a machine than he does a man,” Ty once again said about Kaique Pacheco, who was, not surprisingly, put on the clock. Organized Crime just didn’t know what to do to get rid of that pesky kid on his back. The bull hipped himself and stumbled twice, but Kaique stayed on, for 84.25.


  • Chase Outlaw wins Round 1. I can’t stand to watch that mustache. It’s too Yosemite Sam for me.
  • “The script that we all pre-wrote for these guys is true to form,” says Hummer, blowing the PBR’s cover. (as if we didn’t know)
  • “Kaique gets into a groove where he gets these low scores,” says The Bummer. Um, who’s giving him those low scores, dude? It’s the same “groove” Silvano Alves magically got into when he was about to win his world titles.
  • And then they interviewed Cooper Davis, world #2 rider, but not Pacheco, world #1. That’s twice in one round the PBR dissed him (not even counting the clock business).
Posted in ABBI, Built Ford Tough Series, Bull Riding, cowboys, PBR | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments


God in heaven, do we have to see J.B. Mauney the second the show starts?? Even before the theme song??

J.B.’s canned responses to questions are getting so boring. Hummer even called it a “mantra.” Then Ty Murray droned on with his own mantra about “big moments.”

“One thing we always see when J.B. Mauney’s in attendance, is that bla bla bla” goes Hummer. Then Ty picks up the bla bla bla, praising their Lord. Why are they ranting on about the guy in 3rd place?


“Kaique may scramble the alphabet,” says Craig Hummer. Huh? Need some splainin’, dude. Your mind doesn’t work the way other people’s do.

I thought for sure Stetson Lawrence would ride Crossed Fingers, but that bull turns in mid-air! Hummer babbled that the bull was “finally able to crumple up Stetson Lawrence and able to cross the North Dakota cowboy’s wires,“ which made no sense at all, and then added, “Crossed Fingers is snap, crackle, and pop.” I want some o’ what Hummer’s been drinking.

Big set of horns on Billy Bat Skat. Jess apparently was “able to scatter Billy Bat Skat’s chickens.” I don’t know what Hummer was trying to come up with here, but Lockwood came up with an 88.25.

Another unfathomable Hummerism: “Southern Style might make Kolbaba wish the border was a little farther south.”


Kate Harrison, a prescription blonde, is standing in for Leah Garcia.  Could they find more of a cliché? Fortunately, she seems to be good at her job. However, “a whole ‘nother level” is not English, Kate.


Mike Lee was on Crackerjack, and Ty says:  “Look how every jump and kick is like the one before it.” Lee gets an 86. To me, if the bull does the same thing over and over, that’s not much of a challenge, so why should the score be high?

Today’s Athlete Profile was about Jess Lockwood. It would’ve been fine if he never mentioned J.B. (Remember when this used to be Derek Kolbaba?)

Aaron Roy was not in a good place with Hornet’s Nest, and had to rewrap for a second try. Ty was blaming Roy’s confidence level rather than the bull, who was being difficult. Later, Aaron took on Vegas Outlaw, and spent a bit of time (ahem) prepping, and Ty took another shot at him. “It ain’t like you got much to lose, Aaron – you’re 1 for 19.” Roy rode for 86.50 and performed an interesting involuntary somersault getoff. But what’s with Murray’s attitude? Are we gunning for Canadians now?


Thank god they gave Shorty the job of talking about Kaique Pacheco. Yes, I have noticed that Kaique has the Alves approach – poker face. He’s concentrating, not grandstanding.


João Ricardo Vieira is #5 in the world now. Ty caught the Hummer disease: mixing up his metaphors and clichés, and coming up with how “you gotta have that eye on the tiger.” LOL. Fire Rock, who Vieira has ridden before, didn’t have a great trip. Ty said Vieira was flawless, but the score was just 84.75.

Colonel made an impressive leap into the arena, and this was the 3rd time Gage Gay couldn’t ride him.

Cranky Ty was fussing about Eduardo Aparecido taking too long to get ready on Fit To Be Relaxed. Aparecido was launched pretty high at the end of his ride, which Ty said “adds a little nervousness to Fit To Be Relaxed’s day.” I swear, he really did. And Eduardo scored 86.50.

Kaique took on Slick Rick. “Pacheco with a chance to match Mauney” is how Hummer calls it—he is so besotted by his idol that he sees everything and everybody in relation to J.B.  Pacheco needs 89.50 to move ahead of JB. Rides, lands on his feet, and walks away with an 85.50. “To me this guy is more of a machine than a human,” is Ty’s comment. I know you think that’s a compliment, Ty, but maybe you could find a better way to put it so it doesn’t sound like an insult!

Luis Blanco came up with an 87.50 on Rebel Yell. It’s been a while.


“Master Moments,” which I hope becomes a permanent feature of the broadcasts, featured 1998 World Champion Troy Dunn scoring 95.50 on Rampage during 1999 World Championship event. Yesss!


The “Tarheel Nation’s Titan” is Hummer’s latest encomium for his idol, leading into his excited voiceover. GAG ME.

“He always makes time for the fans,” Hummer claims about J.B. WOW. WTF have you been snorting, dude?? Have you ever seen him on the dirt or on the concourse at New York City? In six years I haven’t. (Or in Connecticut, either.)

And guess who “has more tattoos than anyone would care to see on his body”? (You mean, anyone but you!)

After scoring 86.25, J.B. says, “I don’t really worry about event wins.” He doesn’t have to, because the judges will help him with as many round wins as they can. All he has to do is stay on.

Then the PBR tries to shine up his image by showing him giving some kid a buckle. (Photo op.) “And there’s his daughter with a bow in her hair,” Craig says, apropos of nothing. Sitting next to whom, Craig? You neglected to say which woman—her mother, her stepmother, or their current replacement?

KMN! Now we’re calling JB a “PBR legend”?? Has he died and passed into legend?? Somebody tell that fool Hummer to stop using that word until he knows what it means!


Cooper Davis is having surgery on his right clavicle, where they’re putting in a plate and 3 screws. Eww!

Valdiron de Oliveira sprained his riding hand, but will be back next week.

Brant Atwood broke his right clavicle.

Ben Jones had reconstructive shoulder surgery, and will be back next weekend.

Robson Palermo’s left arm is totally bandaged. IROC hasn’t been ridden. Not a good combo. Robson was tracking the bull really well– until he wasn’t. Supposedly his free arm going straight up was what sent him off the back of the bull.

YAY–Fabiano Vieira passed the concussion test.


Silvano Alves’s bull Big Dan was lying down in the chute. Alves couldn’t get out on the bull—and instead of being DQd, which is usually how they treat him, he was offered a re-ride!

Marchi’s damaged knees held up, giving him his 566th ride and an 84 on Fast Talker.  “Guilherme Marchi has been drinking from the fountain of youth,” was the evaluation, and once again Ty calls him “the Gerry Rice of bullriding.”


Fraser Babbington really pissed off Blues Man. Ty translated what the bull was thinking as it attacked Fraser, digging his head into him as Fraser lay on the dirt: “This is the guy that’s gonna die today.”


Rubens Barbosa could easily have given up, but he stuck on Freakster til almost the bitter end—to 7.98 seconds. He challenged the time, but it didn’t work; he let out a very descriptive screech from where he crouched behind the chutes.

Paolo Lima’s miserable 3 for 23 situation was not helped by Black Warfare, who made it 3 for 24. Sigh.

Jorge Valdiviezo took on Shake It Up, and Ty just couldn’t treat him like any other bull rider. No, it’s all about the nationality. “He’s got all of Mexico riding on his shoulders.” “He wants to be the Adriano Moraes of Mexico.” Stupid, tunnel vision remarks. Jorge looks like one guy, to me, not a whole country. And I seriously doubt that the whole country is aware of a bullrider. P.S., maybe he wants to be the next Adriano Moraes, not “the Adriano Moraes of Mexico.” Think before you put your piehole in gear, Ty.

Marco Eguche on Get Smoked was looking so perfect –until the next-to-last moment (7.85). “He just couldn’t maintain the uprightedness,” was Ty’s assessment. I kid you not. Ty’s rewriting the dictionary.


Jess Lockwood wins his 7th round of the season. Astonishing. This rookie is kicking butt.


Another J.B. Mauney shtick about how he wants Air Time, who has 23 straight buckoffs. Still more about J.B. on Air Time: “You get to watch the two very best go head to head,” according to Ty.

And yet…scroll down to see what happened. Try not to laugh.


After commercial:

“It’s J.B. Mauney who will be the last out of the chutes.”

“Let’s continue to talk about J.B. Mauney and Who Dey.” No, let’s NOT, Craig. A lot of us are SICK of talking about J.B. Mauney. And BTW, the “Titan” didn’t pick Air Time.

OK, so now they’ve backtracked, and Mauney has made “the smart pick” (if this were Silvano Alves, they’d be saying he made “the safe pick”). The prejudice is just blinding!


Canadianaaronroy rode I’m A Gangster Too–now there’s a confidence booster! The bull wasn’t exactly slammin’, but 80 is a score.


Only Stetson Lawrence has ridden Slinger Jr., who has 15 straight buckoffs.


Eduardo Aparecido was just outrageous on Magic Train! He stuck on there no matter what that bull did. His 87.75 tied him with J.B. for 1st in the event (for now), because god forbid the judges should squeak out that extra .25 and put him ahead of their golden boy.

Kaique Pacheco teamed up with Crazy Horse. He was totally in sync with that bull, adjusting easily, and scored an 88.50.  Immediate reflux action from Craig Hummer (did I say reflux? I meant reflex): “But J.B. Mauney, he’s your defending World Champion for a reason — he loves when the pressure is square on his shoulders.” So, just totally discount what Pacheco did, because there’s only one guy who matters.


Stormy “swing for the fences” Wing, bla bla bla –I didn’t even have enough time to finish typing “bla bla bla” before Air Time swung him off. Demented Ty was hoping there would be a re-ride because the bull hung a horn (not much). It happens to plenty of other guys, who don’t get re-rides, darlin’.


Jess Lockwood got bucked off by Milky Jones. Hummer’s non sequitur: “Milky Jones tried to send Lockwood up into the Milky Way.” Does he really think he’s clever?


JRV was just stellar on Hammer It Again, but 7.94 was when he came down. He challenged the time and Craig made some idiotic comment, but I forgot it while I was watching the ride review. He lost some time: it was 7.63 on review. He still gets applause, though.

Marchi on Little Joe needed 88.25 to win, but noooo. I hate that he got bucked off, but I love that growl he does when he gets mad. Somehow the bull got him on the end of his arm, despite spinning into his hand.


J.B.  picked Who Dey. I thought for a second Craig called Mauney “the holy hometown son.”  Maybe he did; I wouldn’t put it past him. As we all know, Mauney is up for canonization. There was an embarrassing buckoff; Mauney hung a spur in the flankstrap, was rushed off to Sports Medicine, and Craig got off the subject as fast as possible. Of course next week we’ll hear all about the injuries.


Kaique wins the event. And then Hummer, Murray, and Gorham all get on the Pacheco bandwagon, though Hummer managed to squeeze in one more incomprehensible comment: “As he marches on… Kaique’s the one with the stop watch.”

Posted in Built Ford Tough Series, Bull Riding, cowboys, PBR | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 14 Comments

NAMPA                Sun. Oct. 9


Okay, here we go: right off the bat, Craig Hummer aggravates me by calling the event a “confrontation.” Then he continues to blather, “the Idaho Center is the playground …and we will see who keeps the kids in order.” What does that even mean?

JB is at the top of the show, of course. A broken rib kept him out for a couple of weeks. Um, other guys who are not considered “dragon slayers” have come back to work faster than that with their ribs just taped up.

“He’s a home run hitter.” How many times have we heard that? Only now, Hummer’s talking about JB, not Stormy Wing. Shorty’s stupid comment: “You gotta take the re-ride, you gotta have your foot on the gas, because JB’s here.” That’s offensive to all the other riders, as if Pacheco and Cooper aren’t a threat to the guy who’s behind them in the world standings.


  • I think Ryan Dirteater should’ve gotten a reride. Trigger Happy wasn’t cooperative in the chute, and had just thrown Ryan forward against it as Dirteater was nodding, then the bull came out awkwardly backwards. Maybe they didn’t give Dirteater a re-ride because he turned down a re-ride in Round 1, keeping a 77 for his ride on Iodine. I’m just sayin’…
  • JW Hart opined that Kaique doesn’t have to take re-rides, unless the other guys start catching up to him. (In Round 1, Pacheco kept 70.75 on Say Goodbye.)
  • Jess Lockwood kept a 76, also in Round 1, for his ride on Lowlife. JW told Jess he shouldn’t turn down a reride, since he’s 5th in the world.


Robson Palermo credited Shorty Gorham’s yelling, “Keep moving! Keep moving!” for helping him stick on Ringworm, for 86.75.

JW said the judges are a little tight here, but when Mason Lowe on Traveler needed 84.50 to move ahead of Palermo, they gave him 84.75.

YOW (and not in a good way)

  • Ty Pozzobon is back. In the 2014 Canadian Finals he got a concussion bad enough to keep him out four months. He came back, and a bull stepped on his chest and punctured his lung. Now he just has a bad back, he said. Heartbreak Kid “turns out to be a heartbreaking ride,” sez Hummer. Well, at least Ty had an 83.50 from his ride on Phantom on Round 1.
  • Big Sky rolled over on Nevada Newman last night, Nevada hit his head on the ground, and was knocked out. This time he got bucked off hard by Pops and looked pretty shaken up. I would say that bull didn’t have much timing.
  • What a great save Paolo Lima did! Scored, 84 got off Pile Driver, and smacked his (helmetless) head into the fence on purpose. I think maybe an end zone dance would be a little less painful.


Nice shot of Jess Lockwood clamming twice while JB preps! If Mom saw that, she wouldn’t think he was so cute anymore .


  • Of course Craig thinks the big headline is JB returning. I am so sick of both their faces.
  • Chase Outlaw miraculously got himself back into position when he was out of wack at least twice. That last judge took quite a while to figure out the math that would give Outlaw an 85.25 and move him to the lead. Judges be funny like that.
  • “I think in the years past, the Mauney Mystique counted for something here.”—Craig. Now he thinks that’s not the case. Tell that to the judges. BTW, there is no “mystique” here. Greta Garbo had mystique. A cowboy from North Carolina does not.
  • Last year in Idaho was when Silvano Alves broke his hip. I’d be feeling a little barfy tonight if I were him. I wish I’d seen his ride on Cowtown Slinger last night (only 82.75), but if I watched PBR Live, with that camera angle, I wouldn’t really see it anyway. I’d be watching an ant on a grasshopper that’s jumping up and down.
  • JW made an interesting observation that the Brazilian riders may all hang together here, but when they go to Brazil, they don’t, and that the Americans are somewhat separate here, but when they go to Brazil, they all hang together. Get it, people? It’s a natural thing to hang with people who speak your language. However, Brazilian riders have made an effort to learn English, while as far as I know, American riders haven’t made an effort to learn Portuguese. A two-way street would be a nice idea.
  • Craig keeps harping on his delusion that Stormy Wing’s a “homerun hitter” and can score 90s when he rides. What reality is he living in?? They are few and far between. Red Bandana tossed Wing. So much for a home run. “Stormy Wing looked stunned when he hit the dirt,” said Hummer. I’ve got news: Stormy always looks stunned.
  • I really thought Cooper Davis was going to go flying off Thunderbolt a couple of times, but instead he was scored 89 (43.50 for the bull). Sometimes if a rider gets wildly out of position, he loses points, even if he pulls himself back into position. Like, um, let’s say, Silvano Alves. But not Cooper Davis. “I felt like I was throwing Hail Marys over there,” he said.
  • Kaique gets into the Championship round by virtue of his lousy 70.75 score. Now do you see why he didn’t take the re-ride, boys? Having a score made it a sure thing. Gambling on a ride could’ve kept him out of the round.


  • Finally—a funny Hitch’d episode! Flint Rasmussen giving JB a lie detector test and making him recite the lyrics to “Ice, Ice, Baby” is good television. Props to JB for saying that Jesse Byrne is his favorite bullfighter. Mine, too.
  • Today’s Athlete Profile was of João Ricardo Vieira. In my recollection, it’s rare for them to feature a Brazilian rider, isn’t it? Maybe this is has something to do with the fact that the PBR has issued its first T-shirt featuring a Brazilian rider, and his name is Vieira. I’m wearing mine right now.
  • Jess Lockwood said he gets to control his own destiny, and he gets to make his own decisions; he didn’t take a re-ride, he has to live with it, and he’s fine with it. Then Cody Lambert chewed him out for not taking a re-ride. Since when is the livestock director supposed to rag on a rider? Jess rode Wipeout in this round. He needed 86.75 or more to lead; he recovered himself several times during the ride, and they gave him 86.50. Was that a little ding, a slap on the wrist for not toeing the party line?
  • Apparently Cooper Davis is teaching Jess not to let anyone else affect him, and to play his own game. That’s a good thing.
  • Stetson Lawrence has an uh, interesting look: a ski cap under his helmet. He did a good job on American Sniper, for 86.75, becoming a new round leader, tied him with Robson.
  • Intensified Clyde Remains unridden, according to Craig Hummer, and he’s wrong. There have been 10 rides. Cody Nance didn’t make 8 seconds in the first place, and he touched the bull; I could see his hand on the bull’s neck. He challenged the call, and after several reviews, the judges finally decided that he didn’t make the ride. There is some justice!


  • At this point, Eduardo Aparecideo, #5 in the world, has a 46.05% riding percentage, which is very respectable, but the direction change by Set ‘Em Up Joe did just that.
  • Kaique kept 70.75 from Round 1 on Say Goodbye. This time, Wonder Flyer threw Pacheco onto his back (Pacheco’s, not the bull’s), and that was not a comfortable landing. It was also kinda unexpected; I didn’t think that bull could unseat Kaique.
  • Guilherme Marchi now has 569 rides under his belt. He scored 86 on Wolverine in the previous round. To me, Lone Wolf was a mystery buckoff. Marchi should’ve ridden him. I’ll bet he thought so, too.
  • João Ricardo Vieira has a 43.53% riding percentage, but Joe The Grinder made short work of him.
  • Say I Won’t Playboy was The One That Got Away. Derek Kolbaba has now gone for 5 events without a ride.
  • Ty Pozzobon, Rubens Barbosa, Nevada Newman, and Ryan Dirteater were out of the Championship Round with injuries.


Derek Kolbaba has been gifted a wild-looking truck, painted with red and white flag stripes, featuring a picture of a bull and rider, with what looks like a silver apartment on top. There are no words…


  • Alves is now 4 for 4 in the event. For his ride on Long Haired Outlaw, he was dumped on with a 79.50, despite the fact that he made a great ride, pulling himself back into position no matter how crazy the bull was. Let me not even say what The Chosen One’s score would have been in this case.
  • After Marco Eguchi scored 85.75 on Stars & Stripes, Hummer said he “is able to fly the Brazilian flag over Stars & Stripes.” Right there in a nutshell is how you get some Americans to hate Brazilians.


Lifting Lives was running 18/0, and then Shane Proctor made it 19.



  • Unridden Midnight Train lurched forward, bashing Pacheco’s  facemask on the front of the chute. 44 for the bull, and Kaique landed right on his knee.
  • Tanner Byrne’s attempt on Smooth Operator, who apparently has been ridden once in 28 outs, resulted in 44.50 points for the bull. “That was a heck of a lot of prep work for a 3-second ride,” said Hummer.
  • Seven Dust sure kicked up a lot of dust, and chucked Marchi pretty high. 45 for the bull.
  • Jeremiah did some fancy dancing, and Lockwood was ejected pretty high. He may have a broken bone in his riding hand, but that butt-landing couldn’t feel too good, either. 44.25 for the bull.


  • Paolo Lima won NYC on Cochise, and was #1 in the world for 6 weeks after that. Here, they put him OTC, and he got bucked off at 7.85. I reeeally thought he would ride him!
  • JW described Marco  Eguchi’s bull Torch as “a little bit of a chutebuster” and “It’s just a different chair you’re gonna sit on this time.” Not the most comfortable. All he has to do is ride, and he will lead. First they put him OTC. Then he got bucked off at 7.93, but he touched the bull at 7.8. Bummer, and his arm is hurt.


Bruiser definitely gives great scores. So far the best was Kaique Pacheco, 94 in Guymon, Oklahoma in 2015. In 2 years, there were 8 rides, total.


JB picked Stone Sober, who has 31 consecutive buckoffs. (Let’s not forget that Emilio Resende rode this bull in 2013 for 88 points.) “He has chosen one of the biggest dragons out there,” Hummer starts rhapsodizing. “JB’s gonna expose him,” said JW. Don’t know exactly what he meant to say. Just as JW says the bull isn’t going to be a problem in the chute, the bull goes berserk and they have to lift JB out of the chute. “He’s got his A-team with him,” babbles Hummer, as if the other riders are JB’s apostles. “One of the few men he lets get this close to him in these critical moments,” he utters, as if JB is a world-class neurosurgeon and this is a global drama. Well, if he doesn’t, asshole, he’ll have nobody to help pull his rope and keep him from getting banged up in there. And he continues: “JB Mauney proves once again that he is one of the best out there.” Okay, wait for it: “Today he has risen up in the sky!” Yes, boys and girls, Craig Hummer actually said that! JB is God. So naturally the score was 92.50. JB’s quote: “That’s the way I like going about bull riding: Wild Western.” Yeah, yeah; storyline. Yawn.

This is Mauney’s first 2016 win. It adds 505 points to his world ranking. Cooper earns another 385.

The post-win interview, talking about why he picked Stone Sober: “I’ve never been a businessman a day in my life.” JB talked about how making “businessman” decisions doesn’t work for him; he likes the bulls “Wild and Western,” and he’s going to pick the rankest bull in the pen. That is a subtle slap at Silvano. Think back to how many times the commentators talked about Alves making business decisions about picking bulls he knew he could ride.


Posted in Built Ford Tough Series, Bull Riding, cowboys, PBR | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Watching “Fearless”

Markus’s Mama pointed out that I’ve been quiet for a while, so I got busy, and here it is.

Watching “Fearless”

If you haven’t seen the Netflix series, “Fearless,” do it. Take advantage of their one month free offer. If you like the Brazilian riders, you need to see this series. If you hate the Brazilian riders, you really need to see this series.

Sean Gleason is the Consulting Producer on the series, which is produced by Boardwalk Pictures, a multimedia documentary company based in California.

Unfortunately, in an effort to be dramatic and prove that bull riding is so dangerous that one must be fearless to be a bull rider, it opens with footage of Neil Holmes after his horrible wreck, being lifted out of the arena on a stretcher. I’m sure we’d all like to forget that incident.

Episode #1: Shining Knows No Borders (Yeah, tell that to the haters.)

First we get Sean Gleason, J.B. Mauney, Ty Murray, Chad Berger, and that jerk from the Texas Star Telegram (Brett Hoffman) opining. Even in a documentary that’s supposed to focus on Brazilian riders, we have to have a dose of J.B.

“Money is what drives bull riding,” says Hoffman. Um, some people do it because they love it. You mean, money is what drives the PBR. The riders who aren’t in the PBR and make doodleysquat really must love it. And if you asked riders what’s the most important thing about bull riding, most of the Brazilian riders, at least, would say it’s to be able to give their kids a better life and a good education, not “I want to be rich!”

I’m just askin’: Why did they include the footage of some blonde starting to “sing” the national anthem?

“The last seven years the Brazilians have been the best.” – Sean Gleason said. Read it and weep, you Brazilian-haters. Even he has to admit it.

J.B. talked about people who don’t like the Brazilians. Finally, I’m glad to hear one of you guys admit there are such people.

Ty talked about how the Brazilians have helped the sport so much, raising the level of competition. Yeah, and that’s what certain sore loser fans (you know who you are) hate. Now the other riders have to step up their game and not do things like show up for work drunk or hung over.

Adriano Moraes talked about the only escapes from where he grew up: soccer and bull riding. “I was a terrible soccer player,” he said. (In case you didn’t know, he lived in a tin-roofed house with a dirt floor and a whole lot of siblings.) “Education is not available for everybody.” And that is what the Brazilian bull riders want to provide for their children. Think about it: have you ever heard any other bull rider say that?

On the Alves ranch in Decatur, Texas, Silvano said, “I have only God to thank.”

Adriano called Silvano Alves “the greatest bull rider that ever lived… it took me 17 years to win two titles!”

About João Ricardo Vieira: “He was born a star.”

We get introduced to Silvano’s grandfather and his father, both bull riders, in Pilar do Sul, San Pãolo. Alves has been winning trophies since he was 7.

“He’s going to be the only guy to do it four times.” Adriano said about Alves winning the PBR World Championship. Hey, Adriano—weren’t you paying attention to what was happening to Silvano, courtesy of the judges, in 2013? He already has won four World Championships—they just gave the trophy to someone else.

Victor from WME/IMG showed up, which is a good thing, so that entity isn’t totally faceless. Can’t remember his last name, though. William Morris Endeavor/ International Management Group is the huge talentmonger that bought the PBR.

Bull riding apparently is televised in 300 million homes. I don’t know how they figure that out, unless there are a lot of Nielsen boxes out there.

Nice to see the low-key bullriding clinic in Itatinga run by Vieira; that’s where you see the stars of tomorrow just starting to get on bulls. Loved his story about being a kid and sneaking out to a bull riding, when only his grandmother knew. Grandmas are good like that.

Rancho Primavera, a big rodeo in Brazil, held an event in his honor. He was referred to as João Ricardo Vieira da Silva; is that his whole name? and if it is, why is the PBR using only part of it?

Adriano said about Vieira: “a late bloomer, 30-31, but he’s healthy as a coconut.” Moraes has a gift for words.

Excellent message: a photo of Vieira on a flag that combines the U.S. and Brazilian flags. He’s an international rider, get it?

Adriano’s explanation of the origin of rodeo whizzed by me.

As another cautionary tale, the filmmaker included a bad Ben Jones wreck. We don’t like to look at that either, folks. We hate it when Ben gets hurt.

Silvano Alves talked about his attitude toward life; one bit I caught was, “And trust what God has planned for you.” He also talked about asking for God’s blessing.

Now that’s a rodeo! Barretos hosts 90,000 people per day over 10 days.

At the family barbecue, we see how much JRV looks like his father.

“We’re all cowboys. We’re all part of the same family.” I’m not sure who said that, but I like it!

They shot a long sequence of Silvano in the Cathedral of the Holy Spirit, in Barretos, where he talked quite openly about how his fractured hip affected him. That was his first injury in 10 years. Alves comes across as very thoughtful and humble. “There is a reason for everything,” he said, and talked more about God. He admitted he had been scared of the surgery, and was nervous about riding.

The scene in the church was intercut with more bits of Moraes. He talked about having lost three friends in bull riding, and said he knows three or four who are paralyzed. They interviewed one who was a paraplegic. “Sports Illustrated voted it the most dangerous sport there is,” Adriano said. “We block the fear factor. If we realized how dangerous the sport is, we wouldn’t do it,” he laughed. Somber note: “The day that you doubt yourself, there’s going to be problems, even if you are Silvano Alves.” And sure enough, that’s what’s been happening this season.

Episode #2 – A Harvest in August

Lots of footage of the 60th Barretos rodeo.

Really interesting comments from Guilherme Marchi and JRV about Silvano—which for some reason I can’t remember.

Cody Nance showed a bit of humility when talking about his experience being in a country where you can’t speak the language; he may have had a glimmer of what the Brazilians have gone through up here.

J.B.’s comments: “It made me realize how hard it is for those guys up here. When I got there, I couldn’t understand anybody, I didn’t know where I was going, I had to rely on everybody… I had a whole different respect for them when I went down there and realized—wow.” He also talked about not understanding a thing people said, and having to fill out all kinds of paperwork.

After Nance made 8, the announcer says, “A hell of a bull rider, dude.” I have yet to hear any American announcer try to say anything in Portuguese.

“Now I understand why the Brazilians do so well coming to America. It’s very ?? [KD Note: I missed something there] if you got your mind right. They don’t understand anything anybody’s saying so they just keep their minds focused on one thing, bull riding. You’re as good as who you compete with, and for me that’s a lesson.” Wish I could remember if that was Cody or J.B. talking.

Former president of Barretos Rodeo Kaka Santos made an appearance. Adriano called Barretos “a rodeo temple.” Moraes talked about not staying in 5-star hotels down there when he was young; most riders preferred to stay on the grounds. We see a clip of some guys camping out. In the beginning of his career, Moraes said, he “stayed in places where there was no running water; I had to find a creek. My bathroom was the woods.” He never won Barretos. “It’s going to bother me for the rest of my life.”

Ty Murray: “No World Champion has ever won Barretos. That’s kinda crazy.” That might change this year, dude, the other way around: Pacheco has already won Barretos.

Cute segment: Marchi singing to himself as he walks around the rodeo grounds and meets up with his family. His father’s handsome, too. Sean Gleason said Marchi is the most positive, upbeat athlete he’s ever seen. I’m pretty sure everyone would agree.

More cute footage: Marchi on an ATV waiting for his kids to come off the school bus, and they climb on with him. His (former) wife Patricia demonstrated barrel racing, with his daughter on a horse behind her. Sitting on a very domesticated bull with his son in front of him, Marchi gets the bull to lie down, then gradually dismounts, leaving his son holding the rope. The bull slowly gets up and starts walking, and the boy holds onto the rope and practices moving his free arm.

Marchi: “Family is everything.”

Adriano re Pacheco: “I’ve known that kid since he was a baby. He’s a third-generation bull rider, so he’s got good genes.”

Kaique looks just like his father; it just tickles me.

Exciting sequence from Barretos: Marchi needing 90 points to take the lead, gets it, then Kaique, needing 69 points to win, has a bull fall sideways and squash him. As soon as he’s out from under, he gets right back on another bull, and wins the event.

In Charlotte, NC, 1 month before Finals:

“We must dedicate ourselves to what we want to do. And I chose to ride bulls.” – Kaique

“We don’t ride just for the fun, just for the heck of it. Every single rider wants to be the best bull rider in the world. If you focus on winning, you’re going to be a loser. If you focus on riding, you’re going to be a winner.” – Adriano.

Ty called Marchi “durable.” Yep, that guy has outlasted a lot of people.

2015 Barretos Finals: the field narrows from 40 to 20 riders in the semi-finals, then 10 in the finals. JRV got injured in the chute, then fell off the bull, and it stepped on his shin.

“The most charismatic competitor” is what the announcer called Guilherme. Amen.

“Man, what a beautiful thing you did today,” – Marchi to Kaique after Pacheco won Barretos. Talk about gracious!

Renato Nunes enters the picture, saying he used to live off the money he made working on other peoples’ farms. “Then I said to myself, ‘I want to have my own farms.’”

Episode #3: The Thrill is Gone

Opening shot of Spiderman sitting looking dejected, obviously after a buckoff. We haven’t seen him around the BFTS lately, have we?

How adorable is this: Renato showing his daughter Renata how to ride a bucking machine sheep.

“I am no longer living the dream I had,” Renato explained his decision to retire. “And if you’re not living the dream, why live at all?”

“This is what I love to do. I was born to do it,” Kaique said. His mother was right on the dirt cheering next to him.

Why on earth was there a segment hyping J.B. Mauney in the middle of this series, showing him “winning” in Las Vegas? As my friend Fran would say: “Feh.”

At the Nunes farm in Zacarias, Brazil, Renato talked about his brother who in 1995 got head-butted by a bull, was in a coma for 17 days, and when he woke up, for two years he couldn’t remember who anyone was. Now he limps and still sometimes doesn’t remember who his family members are.

“For those who have faith, nothing is impossible,” Pacheco said, and considering his trajectory, I’d have to agree. He started riding bulls at 12, and before he was 21, he was Rookie of the Year on the Built Ford Tough Series.

Marchi said 2015 was the worst year of his career. His bull in Thackerville stumbled, gave him a shot in the knee, and tore his MCL and PCL. We see him doing rehab exercises. “But let’s see what God has planned for me,” he said.

Really funny: Kaique on a hotel room bed, watching his rides on an Apple laptop to learn how to fix his mistakes. There’s a very telling scene in another hotel room: Valdiron de Oliveira, Robson Palermo, and Renato Nunes talking about Kaique’s focus, and Renato’s desire to retire. “I don’t need this anymore,” he said. The other two guys look wistful. Something led up to Renato joking: “If I were a woman, I would hit on Kaique.” The other guys: “If you were a woman, Kaique wouldn’t even notice you, he’s focused on bull riding.” Joking about how all Pacheco thinks about is bulls. “I’m still here, but what am I here for?”  Renato asks the existential question. Big story there—he bought a farm and brought his father there; he was very determined to have a place of his own, animals of his own. That’s his motivation. I’d have to call it security and independence, and that’s why he went for the money.

Another scene of Renata Nunes riding a bucking machine, with her father showing her how to wrap. Very cool dad.

Hilarious: a name tag on the pen: Hello, my name is Air Time.

The action: J.B. gets bucked off, Kaique rides for 88, and the crowd goes silent, instead of cheering. You can call them people who hate the Brazilians. Can’t even appreciate a great ride when they see one, because it’s not their boy on the bull’s back.

Basically, the episode was about what it’s like for a bull rider nearing the end of his career.

Episode #4 – THE OUTSIDERS

Alves talked about how the Brazilian riders feel alone in the States, people look down on them, make jokes. Family and friends are far away. So they build a bond with one another, are always at each other’s houses. He also talked about how when somebody gets hurt, they lose confidence. It’s certainly happened to him.

Adriano talking about Robson: “Palermo’s a fighter. He has the strength to face everything that’s thrown at him. He’s going to prove one of the greatest bull riders that ever lived.” Already done it, dude.

Robson bought a ranch in Tyler in 2008, and more recently bought one in Bullard. His son Mateus is adorable and looks like him; Robson shows him how to ride a calf.

Renato’s ranch in Boyd, Texas. He came to the U.S. in 2004-2006 alone to see if he could make enough money here. Yeah, I’d say he’s tough enough.

Valdiron’s ranch in Boyd. Paolo, his son, tried bull riding when he was 8. Valdiron’s kids were born here, so they speak English; his son plays American football, and doesn’t want to go to Brazil.

Gleason talking about how the Brazilians are performing: “Maybe ten years ago it was surprising that these young Brazilian kids were coming up here and performing at such a high level, but in the last few years there’s been a little bit of Brazilian domination. They’ve come in and taken all the titles and taken all the money; there’s just no ifs ands or buts about it. You look at the record books and the World Champions in the last ten years, and the Brazilians have earned every one.” Yeah, even the one the PBR handed to J.B. Mauney.

Renato: “The PBR wants us to come from other countries, but we are not treated like everybody else when we get here.” He talked about a fancy banquet there used to be after Finals, “but they don’t have it anymore, because who would want to hear a Brazilian speaking– because only Brazilians are winning.” “Many things that the PBR does are questionable,” he said. They showed the clip from the event where he was so pissed off about being put on the clock, and said right in front of the camera: “They treat you like crap here, almost always. I have 30 seconds, I can do anything I want.” He had a monster ride, but was scored 81. He objected, because on bulls that give others 90s, Brazilians get 85. Speaking truth to power.

Gleason claims there’s no bias in the PBR “as it relates to the judges, and we do extensive analysis to make sure that that’s the case.” Give me a f***ing break! All the evidence is to the contrary.

JRV: “We want to be judged fairly like the other riders.” Seems like a reasonable expectation.

Then they showed Robson’s wrecks, including one where he got a concussion. He’s sitting with his head down on a table, but as soon as someone comes into the room, he wants to know his score.

“I don’t think them judges score anyone unfairly.”—J.B. Mauney. How would he know? They rain 90s on him almost every time he makes 8.  “You gotta take the good with the bad.” Oh, really? When have they ever scored him badly? Here’s an example: in Tucson he needed 86.50 to take the lead; they gave him 88.

“We are not just competing against the other competitors, we compete against the judges, too,” Kaique said. “If a Brazilian wins here, they deserved it. They can’t take it away.”

JB:  “There’s a lot of people say, they’re on his side, they’re on his side, they want him to win—if [I’m #1] in the world, I don’t want anybody to be able to say, well, they gave it to him.” Well, they did, Blanche; they did.

Needs 89.75 to win the round, they gave him 90

Episode #5-  Glory and the Price Paid

So annoying to have the first person we see be J.B. Like we can’t go a half hour without him.

Next scene opens on Robson’s ranch with him bottle-feeding a calf, then we see Lucas, his baby who was born during the Springfield event. He said usually he calls his wife after an out. She went into labor while he was 9 hours away, but he talked to her almost the whole time.

JRV has a college degree in zootechnics, did you know that? His mother wanted him to be a doctor: “Now that you have your college degree, will you quit this bull riding thing?” Kinda like Bruce Springsteen’s mother saying to him, “When are you going to get a real job?” (Oh, yes she did.)

Those silver bull heads with the eyes flashing red and smoke pouring out of their noses are hysterical. The first time I saw them in Madison Square Garden, I laughed my head off, while being mortified.

Marchi with a torn PCL and MCL still rode in the Finals. Then he talked about his divorce, obviously hurting.

One of the dopey announcers said of JRV: “Is tonight the night he gets hot?” LOL

The judges gave no score to Kaique because the bull’s horn came up and touched his hand. I recall that once when a bull came up and hit a rider (not a Brazilian rider), he was allowed to score; they actually made the distinction between when a rider touches a bull, and when a bull touches a rider. KP: “The judges think they’re right. I don’t think it’s right.”

Valdiron and Nunes having a conversation in the locker room: “Why kill yourself riding bulls if you don’t want to be there anymore?” Renato said.

We see Alves in physical therapy having a miserable time, yet he says, “With God’s help we can accomplish anything.”

Nunes: “When you stop riding bulls, there’s nothing to do in the USA. I want them to say, ‘Renato stopped riding bulls, but he gave the Americans a run for their money.’” And he did.

This one made me wince: Robson’s son is playing with a toy bull and cowboy.  Robson asks him, “Who’s going to ride him?” His son says, “J.B.” Then he says “Uncle Silvano” is going to fall off, and he makes the cowboy fall. He even doesn’t let his father ride. Even he’s brainwashed by the PBR’s Mauney Mania.

Then we see the terrible wreck that took Palermo out of commission for a long time. One of those horrible silence-in-the-arena times, and eventually he’s taken out on a backboard, neck stabilized, and anyone who didn’t know the outcome would think, That guy is now paralyzed. The camera practically rides into the ambulance with him. Then we see Priscila holding Lucas as they travel to the hospital and wait to hear what’s happening with Robson. What was not funny was the sound track: funeral music played as they took Robson out of the arena.

Episode #6 – Being Mortal

Somebody has to explain to me those horrible fake humans at the top of each episode. They’re amateurish and badly done.

“I have always told my mother and father I want to die inside the arena, doing what I love most in my life, which is bullriding… Die happy.”—Marchi, who makes you want to kill him. I thought he cared about his kids. Not so happy for them if he died in the arena.

Robson in the hospital: they kept the suspense going, until the announcement that his injury isn’t as serious as they thought.

Marchi was out for 1/3 of the season with his knee injury and needed surgery. The video showed him making the ride, then grabbing onto two guys to help himself stay upright and get out of the arena.

The shithead judges gave JRV 86 when he needed 86.25 to win. They deliberately didn’t squeak out that last .25. J.B. rode well, and they gave him 86.50 when he needed 87.75 to win. That score isn’t as much of a shock as you realize why the judges didn’t bestow one of their customary 90s on him: they needed to have a last day of Finals. “And the world must wait 24 hours at least before we know our World Champion,” says the ever-annoying Craig Hummer.

Silvano on Rebel Yell – “As soon as a person gets hurt, he loses confidence.” “You can’t live off victory alone, you have to live off victory and defeat.”

Kaique’s mother Giovana, crying about him, told the invisible interviewer that he’s helping his family, but had to go away from them to do it.

Cute: Renato asking if his little girl can “jump” the [stuffed] buffalo. Renata is very cool—riding a bull, and saying, “People who say girls can’t ride bulls—well, you can’t ride bulls, so stop talking.” Renato is so proud of her; it’s great that he lets her ride bulls.

Sad that Marchi had to sit out the Finals because of his knees and bicep surgery, especially during the year he got divorced. Even sadder to see Renato retire, but he looked so happy after he did it!

The shithead judges scored Kaique 88.50 when he needed 89+ to win. That left JRV needing 88.50 to win– but they gave him 86.25, to make J.B. the “World Champion.”

“You did so much for the sport. You defended us.”—Marchi said to Nunes as Renato got ready to leave the locker room for the last time. Hilarious – Guilherme giving Renato a baseball cap big enough to cover his ears. “Maybe I’ll defend you some more,” Renato says. Marchi: “You can’t. You retired.”

Adriano talked about feeling like Superman when you’re riding bulls, then when you stop, you have to hang up your cape. “Being mortal hurts.” The perfect summary.

Posted in Built Ford Tough Series, Bull Riding, cowboys, PBR | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments