Watching J.B. Mauney be “loose” and “cool” and “all over that bull” made me beg him from another time zone to stay on Oklahoma Star, and yee-ha! he did, for 86.50. “It’s about dang time!” was J.W.’s official comment.
With Colby Yates’ free arm coming down and him leaning toward the well, I was amazed he hung in there on Space Chimp and scored an 87. But hey! On the dismount he slapped the bull with his face.
Shepherd Hills Trapper manhandled Valdiron, who ended up sprawled belly-down in the dirt and was helped out of the arena─ a rare sight. I remember the bull creaming J.B. last year; I’d never heard of him, but I knew I’d remember him. J.W.’s comment on SHT: “He’s moving like a chicken full of Ex-lax.” Betcha McKee wrote that!
Ryan McConnel had no chance against Big Tex; the bull reared up for his first jump before he even left the chute. Ryan couldn’t do anything but laugh on his way out; he called the bull a cheater.
Chris Shivers’ ride on The Situation was a cliffhanger! It was reviewed for time, and scored 89.75 (of course). But I can’t begrudge the ride. It was definitely a Tough Stuff moment.
KRAZY KOWBOY VERB TENSE OF THE WEEK:
“Now he’s done growed up.” ─ Chris Shivers, on The Situation.
CAN I QUOTE YOU ON THAT?
“If you’re brain’s in the way, you can’t ride bulls.” ─Travis Briscoe, re taking 6 weeks off and listening to advice. “Turn your brains off and turn your talents on.”—Reese Cates.
“Bull riding isn’t complicated; it’s really simple: keep your chin tucked, your head down, and try your tail off every time.” ─J.W.
“All his buddies are gonna make fun of him for dancing for an 82.50 score.” – J.W., re Ryan’s Western Express.
“Looking at the ground is giving up the ship just a tad early, if you ask me,” J.W. on David Kennedy’s failed attempt on No Fly Zone.
Luke Snyder’s recent health kick broke Little Yellow Jacket’s 12-buckoff streak. Luke landed on his feet, scored 91 points, and is now 8 for 10. “Makes me wanna do yoga,” was J.W.’s comment.
I LIKE IT!
Cody Nance staying right in the center of Predator, for 86.75. Nice celebratory somersault!
Luke Snyder’s well-deserved 88.50 on Slim Chance. That’s how he should be riding!
J.W. says his Mom wanted him to ride bulls rather than play football, because in football there are 11 guys out there after you, but there’s only one bull.
I DON’T LIKE IT
J.B.’s Op Art hat is giving me a headache.
“Marchi will now be a spectator for the rest of the weekend.”
I’M JUST SAYIN’…
PBR bosses, note: A lot of mothers with were at the event their families (translation: female customers).
Gee, there’s that weird Brazilian “slump:” Robson Palermo handled PFI’s Boot Daddy’s direction change so well, you’d never know he supposedly has trouble with bulls going to his right; 85 wasn’t enough (last night Shivers was scored 87.75 on the bull). Valdiron de Oliveira dominated Too Tall, was stuck solidly on that bull, but scored a low 82.75. It’s a miracle Fabiano Vieira was allowed 89.25 on Segs the Juice─ a number that makes sense.
Stormy Wing’s bull Early Bird fell down, plus I swear I saw two slaps on the slo-mo replay, and yet the score was 88.25. Apparently now the judging policy is, Don’t ask, don’t tell…if they’re American.
Dustin Elliott on Big and Rich for 87.25: a very worthwhile trip!
Once again, we missed Tony Mendes’ ride; after staying on Josey Wales, he was knocked out on landing, but walked out after a while with (just) a concussion. Yay for helmets and an 87.75!
Another piece of rotten inconsistent judging: Sean Willingham’s trip on Clam Digger. The bull hipped himself, didn’t stop his forward motion, yet Sean got a re-ride, for 86.25 points. During Last Cowboy Standing, Perfect Poison went down on his rear twice, the momentum in his back half totally stopped, he really messed up Caleb Sanderson’s ride, but there was no re-ride option. What’s the matter─ Sanderson isn’t a RockStar cowboy?
Same old, same old: Hummer throwing a dart at Silvano’s chute prep time: “For Silvano, it’s taking the whole village to get ready against Uncle Carl.” And the chute boss telling Alves he has 20 seconds left…
Two different official buckoff times for Travis Briscoe on My Space: 7.46 and 7.50. His challenge didn’t work, and the whole arena went “Ohhh…!” in disappointment. More of that f***in’ “malfunction.”
J.W. said about Reese Cates’ trip on Cooper Tires Wild & Out that the judges “overloaded” him with 90 points, for mainly spinning. On his dismount from the same bull, Shane Proctor went head-to-head with him and got hit in the chest by the horns. Why he challenged the time is beyond me. Musta been that clunk on the skull.
Look, if the riders have to “invade,” either give them acting lessons to deliver their lines, or let them say it in their own words. Those fake, stiff interchanges just don’t cut it. It’s a good thing Snyder has a cute giggle.
Guilherme Marchi is now 2 for 12.
Aaron Roy was looking just right on Red Hot─ for 6 seconds.
“You’ll see the best bull riders in the world about to wear their hearts on their sleeves.” ─Craig Hummer. Um, do you actually know what that expression means?
“Great readjusting times two by Chris Shivers to keep the dream alive.”—Hummer, talking about Chris’s 87-point ride on Estaban. “”The dream”?? WTF??
Mike Lee’s hang-up on unridden Joe Banana’s was the longest I’ve seen. The bullfighters threw everything at Joe, who just wouldn’t stop moving. Someone got trampled—and wasn’t wearing a helmet.
Clinically Insane dumped Skeeter Kingsolver on his head, conking him out. Skeeter’s response to the medical question that determines how far a rider’s chickens are scattered: “Wells Fargo Arena!” He definitely was ready to walk out.
Stubby is 1 for 11 (11 includes Guilherme Marchi). This isn’t a bull Briscoe would’ve picked; he must’ve done sixteen head fakes. Travis’s landing was frightening; that’s how you break your neck.
Apparently we missed a trip by Speckled Ivory which also had a troubled ending. That bull is fearsome.
Hot little Habanero took just a second to flip Caleb S. off his back.
I’ve talked about Silver Wings before, and he keeps on being impressive. Elliot Jacoby was his 35th straight buckoff. That little front-end double-fake was what did it this time.
Haunted Hotel’s whirlwind turns sure amazed Kody Lostroh.
MoeBandy.com. gave Pistol Robinson a hard time (maybe it’s the mustache), but this bull sure is Austin-friendly.
Only Paolo Lima has ridden Smack Down this season, in NYC; the bull is 1 for 22. The crowd was mad that Colby Yates got no re-ride, but the replay was very clear: no foul by Smack Down.
Lincoln Electric’s Bring It is 2 for 44. (Look out, Bushwacker!) He was high-strung in the chute, and obviously took this grudge rematch with Austin Meier seriously. After Austin hit the ground, the bull bonked him on the back with his big ol’ head.
THE CONTINUING ADVENTURE OF BEN JONES
Ben’s been taking swimming lessons!
He was all p.o.ed again, this time it was Sancho’s fault. There was Ben, crouched on the dirt against the gate, banging against it. He’ll probably feel much better after riding some bulls at J.W.’s place.
J.B. in the Truth Booth: “Feels good to stay on.”