J.B. Mauney got his riding arm stepped on last night and broke his hand─ could the timing be any worse? Just when he’s in the #1 slot, he’s now supposed to be out of competition for 4-6 weeks (best-case scenario, but you know how well J.B. listens to the experts). Robson Palermo re-injured his lower back, Kody Lostroh popped his groin.
Last night’s P.O.V. from Luke Snyder’s helmet cam.
HEY! PAY ME WHEN YOU STEAL MY LINES!
Hummer the Bummer claims he said to his producer that Stickler’s so big it’s like you’re sitting on a sofa. ‘Scuse me, but I said that a few posts ago about some bull or other.
Jory Markiss dressed up his ride on Slider, for 86.75. Local boy Luke Snyder stuck it to Stickler (ha! take that, Hummer!) for 86.60. I will never use the phrase, “able to convert.” It means doodleysquat. Able to convert what to what?
Ryan Dirteater, on an 11-buckoff streak, dealt with Tight Rope stumbling down on his front legs, recovered, then got his face mask and helmet knocked off. He sure earned his 86.25.
Real surprise: Matt Bohon riding Rango, who’s 1 for 18 (Austin Meier was the 1.) Guess Matt’s hips were working fine. 86.25
RMEF Gunpowder and Lead was wild in the chute. He deprived L.J. of a score last week, which supposedly would’ve given L.J. the win. “Redemption! Revenge! Is ever so sweet!” yells Hummer. JDub’s take: “You can see from the look on L.J.’s face, he’s still mad from last week!” Being p.o.’d works: L.J.’s 91.50 was definitely legit!
Haven’t seen Kasey Hayes in a while; this is a rematch on Flirting with Disaster; last year Hayes scored 88. J.Dub described the bull as having an “itchy trigger finger” ─a hilarious visual. This part, not so hilarious: “If this bull’s gonna do anything, he’s gonna wanna go upside down and barrel-roll over.” Glad the bull decided against it. 86 for a good ride.
MY CRYSTAL BALL
Emilio Resende didn’t make it this time on Loose Cannon, but I just know he’s gonna be a great rider. Marco Eguche─ that’s a no-brainer. He already has 6 round wins and 6 Top Five placements.
DO YA ACTUALLY HEAR WHAT YOU’RE SAYING?
- “Facebook gives you exclusive behind-the-scenes access.” Uh, pardon me, Craig, but Facebook is open to everyone in the whole friggin’ universe.
- “It was that move to the right that gets Austin Meier off.”–guess who.
- “The Missouri River flows on, as does our telecast.” And your mouth.
- “With a razor blade, he cuts through the field,” is how The Bummer described L.J. Jenkins. Are ya callin’ him a gang banger?
- “But all these guys aren’t doing it to win money; they’re doing it for the prestige of winning big events,” blathered the guy who not only doesn’t listen to what bull riders say in their interviews, but also doesn’t bruise his ass for a living.
I’M JUST SAYIN’…
Billy Robinson, who does a lot of Touring Pro events, was on Juice, a Mike White bull, another antsy bovine pogo-ing in the chute. Juice hipped himself on the way out, ruining Billy’s ride. “I’ve seen guys get re-rides for less,” said J.Dub. Yeah, if it’s a hotshot rider. Billy looked too disheartened to challenge the call.
Douglas Duncan’s bull, Ricochet, was doing exactly that in the chute. “The bull had a really good pattern…traveled a little from the chute,” was the Hummerblather. Translation: the bull did the same thing over and over, and covered real estate. For most riders, that’s a low score or even a reride. But for a guy being touted as someone to watch out for (because J.B.’s injured and They need someone to put some heat on the Killer Bs), it was a 88.75 ride. More of those Gumby rules.
Former Missourian Matt Bohon hasn’t been riding well and was matched with a bull that wasn’t exactly tough stuff─ gave up leaping and kicking almost immediately, and didn’t do much but spin. 86.50 is a hometown boy score, not a real one.
I didn’t like the Guilherme Marchi/Rockie Smooth matchup in the first place. Marchi nodded even though the bull was lying down. And what was with that messup at the direction change?? Marchi challenged the 7.89 buckoff time, but the review showed him on the ground at 8–which would conveniently be ignored if he wasn’t a Portuguese speaker. Hart said taking the bull lying down shows Marchi’s confidence. I say it shows that he wanted to GTF out before the judges start hassling him to hurry up.
Big ol’ Freudian slip: Hummer started to call L.J. “J.B.” All the recent enthusiasm for Jenkins tells me They’re setting him up as the Next Great White Hope, with Duncan.
Train Wreck (1 for 9) handed Kasey Hayes a few seconds of hell: the bull snagged himself on the chute, it wasn’t a clean out, Kasey got hung up, bouncing against the bull’s side─ but somehow there was no foul? Sorry, Kasey, ya gotta be in the Top 10 for the rules to be applied in your favor.
“I think if you look up the word ‘eager’ in the dictionary, you see photos of Jory Markiss and Chase Outlaw there; they are two high-energy guys…” Hummer, always on the cutting edge of the news.
Robson Palermo’s 87.25 ride on Silver Bullet looked good, but not Robson─ after escaping on his knees, he crawled a little, then stopped and sat back on his heels, then had to be helped, slowly walking out. Rock & Roll made short work of Renato; the World Champion hit the ground hard. That bull is now 0/14.
THE BOOK ON BUSHWACKER
“This bull is a beast of an athlete─ bar none, the greatest bull of all time.” – JDub. “He’s got more press than some of our world champions…bovine athletes like him come along once in a lifetime.” “Put him up there with Bodacious, Red Rock, Mossy Oak Gunslinger. Asteroid’s in that bracket, too.” The bull’s delivered 41 straight buckoffs─ and they’ve used him on Touring Pro events?? Man, that’s sadistic.
LAUGH OF THE DAY
“I know what it takes to get it done; I’ve got a game plan,” said Luke Snyder of his third attempt on Bushwacker─ who got to swinging his hind end like a baseball bat aimed at the sky. The super-hard landing was “powerful enough to weld his helmet onto his face,” cracked Craig. Luke gave a very muffled interview through his facemask–and the bull scored 46.25.
I DID NOT KNOW THAT
Douglas Duncan has ridden thousands of bulls. That must be one sore tushy. Hummer, trying for one of his oh-so-smooth segues, remarked that at this stage of J.W.’s career, he’s probably ridden thousands of. “Well, I got on thousands of ‘em,” said JDub.
Little Willie didn’t seem to know what he was doing, or at least resented that Jordan Hupp expected him to do it. “That little bull reminded me of a mad Jack Russell terrier,” was Shorty’s snapshot.
Renato’s too fun for words. He rode Red Hot, then launched off the bull. His backflip now gets as many cheers as his rides. 88─ yeah, baby!
“These bulls feel flies on their back; they know where to swing their tails to get it.”— JDub showing Bushwacker on the Telestrator, knowing where to send Jordan.
- “Being a cowboy is more than just wearing a cowboy hat. It’s a way of life.” ─Cord McCoy… who unfortunately achieved his 12th in a buckoff streak.
- “He dusted me.”—Luke Snyder’s understatement about Bushwacker.
- “You lose your feet, you lose your seat.”—JDub
Colby Yates and Luke Syder visited Luke’s father’s ranch in nearby Raymore. The plot: using the Ford truck to help clean up trees downed by tornadoes. The running gag: every time Colby performed a task, Luke handed him a dollar. “He musta won a lotta money ‘cause he sure doesn’t work too hard,” Yates tells Luke’s pop. The finale: Luke hands Yates another single. “This makes 4. Go wash my truck, I’ll make it an even 5.”