Of course the first athlete we hear about on the broadcast is JB Mauney, then it’s Asteroid and Bushwacker. While Douglas Duncan is wrapping, the commentators were still talking about JB. Later in the broadcast another voiceover brought him up again. Leah Garcia gave us the scoop on JB throwing his rope backstage as the camera followed him; then he turned around and picked up his rope, after which Cody Lambert gave him a coaching session. Yawn. Pretty soon they’re going to be giving us bulletins on his blood pressure. Is anyone else competing??
THE BOO-BOO REPORT
• Ben Jones is out with a separated right shoulder, so he was recruited for the broadcast booth. (Where is that translator when we need him?) He said his wife cried when he told her what happened. He’ll get X-rays in a couple of days before they decide what to do.
• Guilherme Marchi is out with a right ankle sprain.
GIVE IT A REST, HUMMER!!
More nattering on about “Stormy Wing, our home-run hitter.” The guy keeps getting bucked off, and The Bummer keeps sticking to his story that Stormy “swings for the fences,” i.e., he either bucks off or rides really well. Oh, please. That’s not “swinging for the fences.” It’s a crapshoot.
Even with a hurt ankle, Jory Markiss was spurring wildly before Poker Face got going. Too wildly, actually; he bucked himself off. Then he had to hightail it–the bull charged after him so fast, Jory had to launch himself onto the Shark Cage to escape. JW Hart was amused: “When a 1500-lb bull is chasin’ you, you can run on a broken leg.”
HE’S A TRAVELIN’ MAN… (name that tune, folks)
Austin Meier finally arrived—right after the round ended. Did they really fine him for missing the round?
I’M JUST SAYIN’…
• JB needs to stop picking Bushwacker. Lightning isn’t going to strike twice. What’s really silly: bowing to fan pressure in this area when he must’ve racked up a quarter of a million dollars in fines for not doing pre- and post-show schmoozing. He threw away a chance for a good draw— and more points. JB knew he had no choice but to pick Bushwacker; if he didn’t, people would say he backed off from a challenge. That’s the problem with having his reputation. JDub was right: “I think the audience kinda provoked him into it.” JB’s two-second hesitation before he said “Bushwacker” was him making a decision for the crowd’s benefit, not his. Sometimes showboating is self-sabotage. JB got slammed hard on his back; Justin McKee would’ve said he had his chickens scattered. He looked dazed, got up slowly, then sat on the floor behind the chutes, looking dejected. Did he really expect to ride him again?
• Douglas Duncan put out an outrageous amount of try during a real awkward ride on Sue, slipping and sliding all over, but he scored 86.50. Whatever happened to the idea that being out of position and riding ugly lowers your score? Oh, wait, that’s only for Brazilian riders.
• “Brazilian Silvano Alves remains in command and control…” says the voiceover. WHY THE HELL CAN’T THEY JUST SAY “SILVANO ALVES”??? Why is it always about the nationality?
• Interesting: Shorty and JW discussing the possibility of Asteroid being switched to a right-hand delivery.
I noticed these guys; JW’s comment was, “I tell you what, the bull power today is… I’m glad I’m not riding.”
• Cherokee. That little debut bull did a good job. Interesting to me was that most bulls lower their heads when they’re about to buck, but it looked like Cherokee pulled his shoulders up first. I can’t explain it properly, but it struck me when I saw it. And hey, if you buck off João Ricardo Vieira, that’s not too shabby.
• Little Darkness— Yow! That bull shot out, yanked Alves forward on two jumps, and the ride was over. I think Silvano’ll remember him.
• Xanax: I can see why they named the bull this: he actually was bucking slowly.
• Ironhide: airborne, twisting, kicking out hard, really putting effort into it.
• David’s Dream has a cool move where he rotates his rear while it’s in the air.
SAVING KODY LOSTROH
I applaud every time I see that “Bullfighting 101” clip of Jesse Byrne leaping in the air to stand on the bull’s head for a second so Kody Lostroh could get out of harm’s way.
WAY TO GO, JDUB!
• “Can lightning strike twice? Can Lachlan convert to ride this one?” blathers Hummer. “He can, because I rode two in a row once,” JW responded. I like a good smartass.
• JB left Ropin Dreams prematurely, to put it mildly. “This is not a time in the world championship race to be lookin’ at the dirt at two seconds!” said JW.
• “$111!” Craig over-enthused about the bounty bull price. “A hundred an’ eleven?” JW drawled, “How about a hundred an’ eleven thousand.”
DARE I SAY IT?
Maybe Lachlan Richardson has got his groove back. He rode Mini Me for 86.25 in Round 1, and Xanax in Round 2 for 87. Last-minute Lachlan?
BANG, ZOOM! (You know what TV show that’s from, right? And you know where I want to send Hummer, right?)
“As the whole world watches to see whether he can ride…” Craig, hallucinating that his pinhole perspective constitutes global attention to Lachlan Richardson getting on (and falling off) After Party.
YA KNOW, HE’S GOT A POINT THERE
Leah Garcia asked Mike Lee about the Finals: “Shoot, I’m an old man, I’m ridin’ pretty good.” Okay, he’s slowing down near the end of his victory laps, but still…
Shorty wasn’t kidding: “Brendon and Luke were having a competition for who could hit the dirt first.” JW: “I think Luke won.” It was the fastest buckoff (by Shepherd Hills Trapper) I’ve ever seen; Snyder might as well have not even left the gate.
Mike Lee, Valdiron de Oliveira, Lachlan Richardson, Luke Snyder, LJ Jenkins, Emilio Resende, Douglas Duncan, Marco Eguchi, JB Mauney, Brendon Clark/Edevaldo Ferreira.
World Standings: JB Mauney is now the only non-Brazilian rider in the PBR’s top 5.