Welcome to Furniture City

GRAND RAPIDS: I’m going retro, because a couple of things here affected the Finals.

“Welcome to Furniture City.” Now there’s a thrilling moniker. And Craig Hummer made it worse: “We’ll see which cowboy can build a foundation…”

HIGHLIGHTS—in case you forgot by now

  • João Ricardo Vieira ended Rango’s 16-buckoff streak. That is one strong rider!! The slo-mo camera shows how straight up Rango’s kick is. 91.75
  • I don’t think I’ve ever seen a bull leap as far into the air as Buck Wild did. Ty Murray likened him to a bomb going off under you. That’s a ridiculously athletic bull, flying with real hang time.  45.50
  • Jory Markiss may have touched I’m a Gangster Too, but even I’d be willing to overlook it, after seeing him breaking forward over and over, fighting for it.  He deserved that 92.24—his first 90+ ride. Maybe the bull’s hump hit his chest—I seem to remember that happening once before; he objected that the bull came up and hit him. This time he was miked, so we heard him saying all through the ride, “Go! Go! Go!” Or was it, “Oof! Oof! Oof!”? Showing off all his logos on camera—smart boy. He was remarkably subdued on his way out to get his buckle, but still hammed a little for the camera. I guess he did all his screaming right after the ride. He just looks so great up on the Shark Cage standing 10 feet tall—he’s got charisma, for sure. Some acting agent needs to get a hold of him.
  • The highlight of Luke Snyder winning the Iron Cowboy event brought a tear to my eye. He also set the record for consecutive events: 275 on the BFTS. Man, that is one sore butt. Watching him during his 89.50 rematch on Cheerio gave me new respect for his ability. He was adjusting position, loosening his seat, in mid-air! “Man, I couldn’t be more tickled…double points in this round,” he said. “I’m going to keep trying to climb that ladder.”
  • Shorty Gorham said the dirt was good, but later said he didn’t know why the bulls were falling down. (Lots of them.) IMHO they had hangovers from Saturday night.

I’M JUST SAYIN’…

  • It’s fine to remind people that JB is the only guy to ride 8 of 8 bulls at the World Finals, but I’m sick of The Bummer and Ty Murray making this championship a one-man race.
  • Shorty compared Alves to a base-hitter who’ll take a walk if you give it to him, compared to JB who’s a home-run hitter. That’s pretty insulting to Alves.
  • Interesting moment: in the locker room, Alves was talking to Mauney with a smile on his face, Mauney briefly acknowledged it without looking at him, then proceeded to remain silent. Wonder what Silvano said?
  • Marco Eguchi, #4 in the world, used a helmet in Brazil, but not here. Why??
  • According to Craig Hummer, JB Mauney’s ride on Bushwacker “made national headlines.” He needs to get his head out of that little hole it’s stuck in. A national headline is Germany invading Poland, or Nelson Mandela winning the Nobel Peace Prize. That ride made bullriding headlines, okay?
  • After a whole load of Hummerblather up front (“Is Big Tex “Rocks” his adversary or his partner in crime?”—huh??), the bull bucked off JB in 1.9—keep this in mind for the Finals. Later we got a big helping of, “He is the dragon slayer. The thing that he hasn’t done is to win a World Championship,” from Ty. Western Way was unridden, and they had a pretty rocky start, but the wild ride turned into one of those JB scores: an absurd 93.25, so he could pass Marco Eguchi and win the event.
  • Oh, brother—the Clash of the Cowboys “hostess” is back to wearing short-shorts. Charming, letting us see Douglas Duncan barf after climbing on bales of hay and jumping up to grab the flag.  Do these PBR jerks have no class at all? Or even common sense? Do you really think people want to see someone puke?

YA HATE WHEN THAT HAPPENS
Brendon Clark looked a little daffy as he walked out after a Round 1buckoff: another concussion. He didn’t pass the memory, learning, and recognition test, either.

FASHION ALERT!
Jory Markiss has a new outfit: black and white windowpane checked shirt, red chaps and vest. Stylin’!

TRUE DAT

  • Believe it or not, Craig Hummer said this about the bullfighters: “Don’t get thanked enough or paid enough.” I hope the PBR listens to him.
  • “You’re the only person who holds back your success.”—Jory Markiss
  • “This sport does not get easier.”—Silvano Alves
  • “You don’t see many guys in the NFL who are in their 12th season and 37 years old.”—Ty Murray talking about Billy Robinson and his recent surge.

JUST ASKIN’…

  • Silvano Alves has a 65% career riding percentage. Does anybody know if that’s the highest ever? I’m curious.
  • I wonder how many bulls Guilherme Marchi’s been matched with that go away from his hand, compared to the number that go into his hand.

IF BEN’S NOT DANCING…
“I just kind of stay out of Ben Jones’s way.”—Ty Murray, after Kiss Destroyer took advantage of Ben’s bum shoulder.

I JUST CAN’T RESIST
One of The Bummer’s worst: “The Don looking more like The Dud.” The bull went down and kept scrambling around on the ground like a mental case. More orange flags than you’ve ever seen hit the dirt.

HUMMERBLATHER
“If Alves bucks off, JB Mauney has another golden opportunity to jump by leaps and bounds.”—The Bummer, flunking English class.

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About Bull Riding Marketing

Creative services, marketing and public relations professional from entertainment industry background. Published in magazines and newspapers worldwide. I believe bull riders are the new rock stars.
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