Fayetteville Flashback

Fayetteville    Oct. 4-5

The closer it gets to the Finals, the more JB-obsessed the PBR boys become. It’s embarrassing. Put your tongues back in your mouth, guys.

The only person with a tinge of objectivity left is Ty Murray, who actually got ticked off at Mauney for what he termed “a hollow victory.” JB would’ve won the event without even riding, but he got bucked off—no bonus points. He gave up pretty easily, looking at the ground. Ty: “That’s the thing that’s kept him from winning the world title… I don’t understand! … He’s won on this bull before. …The bull practically lives in his back yard; he knows everything about him.”

HUMMERBLATHER

  • Craig’s illiterate comment on what the score might be for JB Mauney on Stacks of Cash: “We’ll see how well the judges think it is.” The judges thought it was so “well,” they gave him an 86. (Cute post-ride bit: after JB plopped his hat back on, Flint R. pulled it down over his ears—not an easy accomplishment.)
  • “It’s almost as if someone’s writing a Hollywood script…” Wasn’t that last year’s script? Or was that from the let’s-try-to-get-a hundred-90-point-rides-for-Chris-Shivers campaign?
  • Hilarious: The Bummer thinks Delco “needs to ramp up the wattage.”
  • Git-R-Done is still pink from 8 cans of spray paint. “Let’s see if he combines with Silvano Alves to put him in the black.” Huh?? I can’t even begin to figure out WTF he’s trying to say.
  • “Not only does JB want to see some mistakes from Silvano…” Does the nitwit realize that with this kind of comment, he’s accusing Mauney of poor sportsmanship?

HIGHLIGHTS
Guilherme Marchi has a 60.6% riding percentage!

WE HATE WHEN THAT HAPPENS!
After Ben Jones already did his victory dance, the judges decided they saw a slap. The crowd was bummed, and yours truly made a howling sound. But at least Ben didn’t go storming off in a terrible state—he handled the disappointment like a pro.

I’M JUST SAYIN’…

  • Cody Lambert decided that bulls need to score 44 or more to make the cut for the Finals. Still bizarre to me. Shouldn’t their entire season count? And why does he introduce green bulls at the end of the season? It’s not like they have a prayer of making it into the Finals, and they screw with the rider rankings.
  • Ryan Dirteater kept a 73.50 instead of taking a reride, and nobody gave him flak. Good thing his name isn’t Silvano Alves.
  • More of that Shaft Silvano Strategy: last night he rode Will James—a tough bull, according to Ty Murray—and made it look easy, so he was scored just 82.75. In Round 2, he handled Stinger’s weird arrhythmia, and was handed only 84.50. This is about the 30th time the judges have pulled this stunt. Wonder what his points total would’ve been by now if he were judged by the same standards as other riders
  • I wish I’d counted the number of times I heard JB Mauney mentioned tonight; it didn’t matter who was riding or what was going on, he was the theme. Clearly he’s “The Great White Hope” for all the so-called fans of the sport who can’t stand the fact that Brazilian riders are playing that sport rather well.

SCRATCHIN’ MY HEAD…

  • How do you get away with naming a bull after Springsteen without getting permission? You know he’s a bit of a control freak, right?

THE COWBOY LAMENT
Leah Garcia: “What motivated you?”
Douglas Duncan: “I’m tired of falling off! I’m a professional bull rider…I should know how to do it by now.”

NEW FACE:
Brenton Chaffin, who made it to 7.71 on Kiss Animalize.

JUST ASKIN’…
Does the PBR really think that at this point in the season we give a damn about the Clash of the Cowboys?

Interviewer, to Jenkins: “How’d you like the challenge, LJ?”
“Uh, I liked it once it was over. I wasn’t too excited about it in the beginning, but we had to do it.” (Hear that, folks? The overseers got those boys workin’ that plantation.)

FASHION ALERTS!
Somebody coordinated Billy Robinson’s pretty blue-green shirt with his eyes—now that’s fashion forward.
Jory Markiss, stylin’ again, in a pink windowpane check shirt.

TEEHEE
Shorty slipped and called Mauney “Jerome.” Doesn’t sound as cool as “JB,” does it?

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3 Responses to Fayetteville Flashback

  1. closeobserver says:

    The closer it gets to the Finals, the more JB-obsessed the PBR boys become. It’s embarrassing. Put your tongues back in your mouth, guys.
    ■More of that Shaft Silvano Strategy: last night he rode Will James—a tough bull, according to Ty Murray—and made it look easy, so he was scored just 82.75. In Round 2, he handled Stinger’s weird arrhythmia, and was handed only 84.50. This is about the 30th time the judges have pulled this stunt. Wonder what his points total would’ve been by now if he were judged by the same standards as other riders
    ■I wish I’d counted the number of times I heard JB Mauney mentioned tonight; it didn’t matter who was riding or what was going on, he was the theme. Clearly he’s “The Great White Hope” for all the so-called fans of the sport who can’t stand the fact that Brazilian riders are playing that sport rather well.

    Yet again you hit the head on the nail! I agree with you 100%! JB didn’t win the World Title, it was practically given to him by the PBR! A good case in point: if you slow down his ride on Bushwacker, he actually fell off before the required 8seconds! So to me, there were only 2 other riders that actually rode Bushwacker, and it wasn’t JB!

    Like

  2. Did Springsteen sue some musicians several years ago because they were playing his songs live but they weren’t union members? Wonder how the good ol’ Murkin boys of the PBR feel about that?

    Like

    • There’s no law that says non-union bands can’t play someone else’s songs. (Just last month my town had a “festa,” and the Springsteen cover band was doing its thing.) Bruce couldn’t possibly sue all the bands all over the world who perform his music. Maybe there was some unauthorized use of his songs in a movie or something? That would be a suicidal move, but some people are stupid. I wonder what Bruce would do if he knew a bull was named after him? Maybe I’ll contact his publicist and find out!

      Like

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