PBR in Laughlin, NV – Sept. 21

Is it just me, or is all that loud hyperbolic hype at the top  of the broadcast turning you off?

Pretty amazing top tier going into Sunday:
1. Fabiano Vieira, even with his bum riding arm
2. JRV, rookie (I have succumbed to laziness—in a Word program it’s a pain to find the cedilla to put over the “a” in his name. Besides, if you watch bull riding and you don’t know who this is by now, give it up.)
3. Guilherme Marchi, the next “grand old man” of bullriding
4. Silvano Alves, coming up on the inside
5. Mike Lee—he’s been surprising me all year with this resurgence, and sure getting a lot of exercise doing those victory laps.
6. Eduardo Aparecido, This is unexpected. I kinda thought Marco Eguchi or J.B. would be here by now.

STOP THE PRESSES!
Wow, an articulate cowboy: Matt Triplett. And he sure deserved to strut after his 88-point ride on Tyree’s Pretty Boy.

LIKIN’ IT
Yes! Brendon Clark is a commentator, just like I told him I wanted.

SPOTLIGHT
Neil Holmes in his BFTS debut. Check this: Round 1, 84; Round 2, 87.25 and a flying dismount from a bull sadly named Reaganator (though not the voluntary flying-over-the-animal’s-head dismount that was bronc rider Hawkeye’s specialty). Holmes has been riding for 10 years; this summer, he scored 88, 90.50, and 92.50 in the CBR’s Road to Cheyenne Finals. Looking at his CBR scores in the last few years, I can say that with only a couple of exceptions, he has just two gears: north of 86, or zero. I’d say that’s a cowboy worth watching. His interview quote: “I just wanted to let everybody know I was here and I’m here to stay.” Succinct.

WHO DO THEY THINK THEY’RE FOOLING?
Headline: U.S. riders have won the last 4 events. Yeah, because look at how many times the judges shafted the Brazilian riders and failed to notice Cody Nance’s spurs.
On Kiss Animalize, “Nance found a way,” says Craig Hummer, to get an 86.50 score. You mean, his right spur found a way.

Ty Murray was blathering about how the top 3 guys are struggling with things: JRV is struggling with bulls that turn away from his hand, Fabiano with his shoulder injury, Marchi with “Father Time” (and more of the bulls-turning-away-from-his-hand thing). Shorty chimed in about how they’re all struggling with something. Yeah, boys, and they’re STILL the top 3 guys, so as Liz Lemon would say, “Suck it, monkeys!”

We should track how many bulls Cody Lambert gives JRV that turn away from his hand. (Vieira still won the most rounds of anyone this season.) Marchi also was matched with another bull going away from his hand. How many times does this happen?

There was more J.B. hype (a montage) before a commercial, then the Athlete Profile after. Why? To make us think he’s still in the Finals race? Later we got an Extreme Close Up at the chute as he sat on Cowboy Phil. The ride was good as far as it went—halfway—then J.B. got into a bad position. Even so, Ty managed to find something to praise.

THE ANTI-BRAZILIAN RE-RIDE STRATEGY: 50 SHADES OF SHIT

  • Because of Finger Roll’s bad chute behavior, JRV was offered a re-ride— or 64 points. Vieira didn’t fall for it. He did the math in his head and said he’d keep the 64, because 9 times this year he hasn’t scored on a re-ride. And there you have it, monkeys: the Killer Bs are smarter than you. They’re not trying to prove anything; they’re trying to win.
    Silvano’s bull, Mr. Twitter, blew up in the chute, then just kept spinning. So here’s the choice handed to Silvano: 63.75 or a re-ride.
  • Next on the crazy train: J.W. Harris (out with a back injury) and Neil Holmes were helping Chase Outlaw at the chute. Crazy Trip has history of giving scores to left-handed riders, and whaddaya know: Chase is one. The bull did a lot of lurching, and Neil kept Chase from getting hurt. Then came the rewrap. Lots of time. After all that, the bull hip-hopped sideways, barely left the chute, and bashed Chase against it upside down. Outlaw was offered a re-ride—without an insulting score. Just a plain old re-ride. Later, he was matched with Brown Sugar, a bull that Ty says goes to left.
  • Emilio Resende’s bull banged against the rail a few times, sending people up the fence. Though Emilio rode just fine, the judges gave him a choice: a re-ride or 70.75. Yeah, the bull stunk, so penalize the rider.
  • When Mike Lee went out on Dr. Wishes, the bull did some up-and-down, no spinning, stopped dead, and Mike climbed off like he was dismounting a stuffed cow. No re-ride jazz: he got an 80 instead.
  • Here’s a head-scratcher: Flyin’ Crazy bucked Nunes half out of the chute—Renato’s leg was completely over the top rail; pretty scary. Then the bull hung his head in the chute rail on the way out—I’ve never seen anything like it. How that wasn’t a re-ride beats me, but Renato rode and scored 89.50. (Probably because he was good and mad.) His back-flip was only from the Shark Cage, and kind of wonky, but WTF, I’ll take it.
  • Fabiano kept a 51.50 in Round 1, with Ty calling his result a dismount, not a buckoff, and discounting the shoulder problem, saying it wasn’t involved.
    Those judges suck. And now Ty does, too.

TWO-FACED TY
Ty said J.B. Mauney proved last year that the Alves re-ride strategy doesn’t work. HOLY M.O.G., YOU TWERP! Do you think we’re all half-wits?? That we didn’t pick up on all the harassment, DQs, and low scores thrown at Alves all year, and all the high scores and selective treatment thrown at J.B.? (And for the millionth time, yes, J.B. is a great bull rider, and it’s not his fault that the PBR thinks he wears a halo.)

Later we’re told Alves has a 59.62% riding percentage, 3rd highest of all time–and Hummer starts quibbling about how many  scores were below 80! (Craig must be really slow if he doesn’t know why.) Here’s the unbelievable part: Ty then contradicted himself, saying that Silvano’s strategy won him 2 championships. (Ya mean 3.)
Ty needs someone to talk to at home. He just can’t stop. There was one pearl of wisdom in the whole broadcast: “Every time you ride, you either win something or learn something.”

I’M JUST SAYIN’
There were a lot of awkward entrances by the bulls, and Western Hauler took a spill onto his side after dumping Marco Eguchi. Finally Shorty, uh, mentioned that yeah, the sand was a bit of a problem; too soft, too deep; pock-marked from lots of hooves. Once again, who’s in charge of dirt? Why can’t the organization find a local supplier of proper dirt, instead of sometimes dirt, sometimes sand, sometimes limestone chips? It’s not safe for the bulls, and if it’s not safe for the bulls, it’s not safe for the cowboys. Plus the sand slowed down Mike Lee’s victory run after his 87.25 ride on Meat Hook! But his event win moved Lee to #3 in the world standings.

Lachlan Richardson is making me despair. The way More Big Bucks launched him against the chute, if he wasn’t wearing a helmet, his skull would’ve split. The kid is jinxed.

Renato went way too wild, doing a back bend over Modified Clyde’s rump. That is one flexible spine! (Renato’s, not Clyde’s)

“As good as you ride, where have you been?” naive Leah Garcia asks Neil Holmes. Uh, stuck behind the race barrier, girl.

TAKE YOUR HEAD OUT OF WHERE IT IS, TY!
“Quit acting like a girl,” Murray said to J.B. Oh, really, little boy? You mean, like the “girl” who was such a sissy that she gave birth to you? Or the “girl” that was such a wuss that she gave birth to your son? You think you know what pain is? HAVE A BABY, you little twerp, and stop insulting women! Maybe this half of the human race should start saying, “Stop acting like a boy.”

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About Bull Riding Marketing

Creative services, marketing and public relations professional from entertainment industry background. Published in magazines and newspapers worldwide. I believe bull riders are the new rock stars.
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26 Responses to PBR in Laughlin, NV – Sept. 21

  1. You brought a big smile to my face. I didn’t know that astounding out-clause about being allowed to manipulate the outcome of just about any sporting event, but you did confirm what I heard from more than one source about why Tuff Hedeman left the PBR. Money trumps morals behind those scenes. When the venture capitalists bought the PBR, all the founding cowboys except Ty Murray and Cody Lambert took a walk. (Cody got demoted, which is just as well.) At this point, the PBR management team is the Bull Riding Mafia. I wish the riders would unionize–then maybe it wouldn’t be as easy to fix events. One thing is for sure: the BRM hasn’t convinced Silvano Alves to throw a fight!
    I’d love to hear more from you. Here’s the direct email address: BullRidingMarketing@BullRidingMarketing.com
    I’m glad some people appreciate my x-ray vision. It makes up for the people who hate me!

    Like

    • closeobserver says:

      Still NO Silvano Alves 3X PBR WORLD CHAMPION merchandise!!!! They sure didn’t waste any time when JB won just one world title!!

      Like

      • We’re going to have to start making our own tee shirts. I think it’d be legal, as long as we didn’t put “PBR” on them. I think the shirts should have a picture of Silvano and underneath it, “Nyah-nyah!”

        Time for a campaign: comment on the PBR website and demand tee shirts, sweatshirts, posters, and anything else. I think I’ll say something on my Facebook page.

        Like

      • closeobserver says:

        That sounds like a Plan! I was hoping & waiting for PBR to come through before Christmas but another THUMBS DOWN for them again!

        Like

  2. S. says:

    Speaking of loud hyperbolic hype, the guy at the beginning booming about how we rarely see history as it happens should be informed that we are always seeing history as it happens, unless we can’t see.

    I wish they’d tell Ty Murray to find something new to bang on besides his re-ride drum. We all know what he thinks about it. Silvano Alves isn’t changing his strategy. It is time to move on. And the fact that Ty rarely acknowledges that injury and long-term planning play into these decisions is infuriating. I guess everyone’s forgotten that Alves has a shoulder injury that supposedly needs surgery, since he’s not making a big deal about it.

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    • LOL! Your first sentence is absolutely CLASSIC. You should tweet that all over town!

      Yeah, Ty is really getting up my nose.The dumb thing is, no matter how much everyone rags on the Brazilians’ re-ride choices, and penalizes them with low scores and DQs, they STILL are kicking everyone’s asses– yet these dopes keep saying they’re doing everything wrong.

      Like

      • S. says:

        J.B. beat Silvano for the title once, so obviously the All-American-Ty-Murray-Approved-Always-Take-the-Reride way is the only way. Ignore all evidence to the contrary.

        I love how they go off about how Joao “can’t” ride bulls that go away from his hand (shades of the old commentary on Guilherme and how he’d never win without the draft because he also “can’t” ride bulls that go away from his hand) and that’s a huge liability. But with how piss poor riding percentages are, a guy who gets at least half his bulls going into his hand, and rides most of them, is the world #1. Would he be better if he got over whatever his issue is? Sure. But the commentary on it is stale, stale, stale.

        Honestly, I look at the top 35 and I wonder how some of them are even there. I can’t recall the last time some of them did anything of note.

        Like

      • Well, we know J.B. didn’t really “beat” Silvano. About that “can’t ride bulls away from his hand” thing: Marchi and Vieira are still kicking American ass, so does Ty want them to ride bulls in both directions, and be even BETTER than they already are? Doofus.

        Like

      • S. says:

        I actually think Ty Murray would like that– he has always been a big admirer of Robson Palermo and Marco Eguchi, among others. For the most part, his criticisms or riders seem to be based on whether they hit certain hot topics of his, not based on where they come from. He’s just incredibly repetitive.

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      • If they did achieve superhumandom, he’d just find something else to harp on. I think he’s just blabbing his head off because he has no one to talk to at home now. Now we’ve got TWO Chatty Cathys in the booth. OY! Where in the world is JDub when we need him?

        Like

      • S. says:

        I scared myself, wishing JDub were there instead. Poor Ty. He’s just not a natural at giving commentary. He tries, but he’s so circular and repetitive, and Hummer doesn’t help him out.

        Like

      • It’s a case of the blabbermouth leading the blabbermouth.

        Like

      • S. says:

        Never mind on the JDub thing. I flew into an immediate rage, but I think in the weekly recap for Oakland, he said that Silvano was TRYING to get low scores. Um?!

        Like

    • closeobserver says:

      JB didn’t beat Silvano! It’s the judges that beat him! Look at the scores Silvano received throughout the year, and compare it to JB’s…..do you see the pattern?

      JB didn’t ride the full 8 seconds on Bushwacker, if you see the clock behind him, the clock says 7.8…but they still scored him! Look at the World Finals, all his scores were over 90+. That’s real evident that they didn’t want Silvano to get his 3rd World Time(to me, he is the only Back to Back to Back World Champion)!!

      Like

      • Wow! I didn’t even notice The J.B. Clock, I was so glued to Bushwacker’s performance. (He was definitely holding back; that dirt was a problem, and I think Shorty even commented on it earlier–the bulls were mostly being ginger with it.) Yeah, the judges inflated J.B.’s scores and all year were dinging and harassing Silvano. It got worse as it got closer to the Finals. I’ve never seen such blatant bias in a sport; I don’t know how those judges sleep at night. For all their Christian baloney, they were cheating and lying and harming someone who had done them no harm.
        Silvano IS the back-to-back-to-back World Champion.

        Like

      • closeobserver says:

        Thank God for Directv’s DVR! I played it in slow-mode, the clock clearly shows he hits the ground just shy of 8seconds.

        Oh yeah, did you see Robson Palermo’s article on PBR website? He jokingly says that he misses the judges repeatedly saying “lets go, lets go….your on the clock”!

        Like

      • Thanks for the tip; it was a good read. I was surprised that PBR let the article go uncensored!

        Like

      • S. says:

        I noticed how close it was to the buzzer at the time, but they were already yelling about how J.B. slayed the dragon or whatever, so I knew it would never be reviewed. J.B. riding Asteroid and Bushwacker in the same year is a good story– judges reviewing and finding their golden boy was 0.2 seconds off from “making history” is not a good story. I don’t blame J.B. for this at all– he was really going at it and clearly thought he rode.

        Of course, if it had been another rider, would they have taken a closer look? Isn’t that a question for the ages.

        Like

      • That depends. If it was Silvano, they’d have reviewed it & decided he didn’t make 8. If they decided he did, they’d lowball him.

        Like

  3. closeobserver says:

    What can we do to get our point across with PBR? It’s clear as day on what they’re doing with the low scores!

    Like

  4. Tired of being fan says:

    Did not watch last night as well even though it started one hour earlier. Quickly losing interest in the PBR. Guess I could watch on CBSSN tonight. Not much fun when you already know the outcome 24 hours before it is shown on TV.

    Like

  5. Tired of being fan says:

    The event came on too late for me last night to watch on the computer. Really no reason to watch…all the Brazilians scored below 80, but wait…Mike Lee bucked off? Oh woe is me…what will they do…wait Chase is back…no clock on him because he speaks English…same scores just a different venue…why watch?

    Like

  6. Elizabeth Butterfield says:

    Oh how I Look forward to your column, nothing gets by you.
    Thanks so much, pure joy to read and oh so true.

    Like

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