A funny thing happened on the way to the Finals: I started to lose interest. That’s why it takes me so long to post something these days. Why is my enthusiasm starting to flag? Because the PBR events have become so predictable: the ratbag judges will score Silvano Alves in the 60s and 70s most of the time no matter how he rides, which is even worse than last year, when they decided to keep him mostly in the 82-84 range, no matter how he rode.
They will continue to ignore Cody Nance’s spur-hooking, use the J.B. clock, inflate some American riders’ scores (even more than last year) and shave points off Brazilian riders’ scores, and DQ a Brazilian rider at the drop of a hat, while they let American riders take as much time as they want in the chute. Just about every week a Brazilian rider gets DQd for any old thing the judge feels like, but remember the huge outcry when Pistol Robinson was put on the clock? One or two American guys in a year get DQd for taking too long in the chute, and holy hell breaks loose.
Still, I love watching the riders. I just have to score them in my head instead of taking the judges’s word for what their rides are worth. And I also keep watching because in another couple of weeks, I’ll never get to see Bushwacker buck again. Thank god for YouTube.
Bushwacker was the $50,000 bounty bull. Stormy Wing won the event, the first win of his career, with a 90.75 on Mr. Bull.
The judges on duty were Jeff Shearer, Pacheco, Pinchin, Paolo Crimber, and I’m probably missing one.
- It’s utterly corny to use the phrase “one for all and all for one,” (or is it the other way round?), but when you see Jesse Byrne zooming to protect his brother from a bull, and dad Ryan choking up when he talks about Tanner’s wreck, it’s not a cliché.
- Now this was a ride: Jason Malone’s 90.25 on Fire Rock put him into the first championship round of his career so far. He did have plenty of prep time, though.
- Billy Robinson deserved that 89.50 for his ride on Semper Fi; his right arm whipping in sync with the bull’s spin was a thing of beauty, and it tied him with Vieira.
- Gage Gay’s the #1 Rookie, and his 87.25 ride on Rooster’s Egg was evidence why. It was a tough ride, and Gay was impressive.
STOP HIM IF YOU’VE HEARD THIS BEFORE
- “It’s not a countermove if it’s not timed perfectly.”—Ty Murray
- J.B. Mauney didn’t make 8, so Ty complained that J.B. was planning where to escape: “That’s a dismount, not a buckoff!”
- Guilherme Marchi is struggling with his confidence, age, and knee trouble. Etc.
- “I’d love to find the guy who decided you have to ride for 8 seconds.”—L.J. Jenkins, King of the 7+ Seconds Ride.
- Every time I watch an event with someone who’s never seen bull riding, I hear something that cracks me up. This time it was Dad. After seeing Eduardo Aparecido thrown by Get Smacked, Douglas Duncan dumped on his butt in the dirt by Hard Knocks, and Renato earning a re-ride, he watched Joao Ricardo Vieira perform on Boogie Shoes (for a crummy 80 points, I might add), and said, “That guy’s good.”
- Josh Faircloth’s ugly K.O. that left him flat on the ground possibly could have been prevented with a helmet.
- Now, here’s the thing: Joao Ricardo Vieira’s ride on Cowtown Slinger was judged “picture perfect” by Ty Murray, yet his score (89.50) was lower than Jason’s. Was 206th-ranked Fire Rock (44.50) reeeeally that much better than 85th-ranked Cowtown Slinger (43.50)? Or is this another situation that has to do more with the riders’ nationality?
- The J.B. Clock was in full operation while Mauney took forever in the chute on Heavy Dose; we heard him say, “He’s squattin’ real bad.” Since when has a squatting bull ever kept the chute bully from putting a Brazilian rider on the clock? So much for all the commentator guff about J.B. being so quick to get out of the chute. Don’t ya hate when people tell you the opposite of reality, and think you’re stupid enough to disbelieve your own eyes?
- Disgusting “F.U.” from the judges to Alves: Take 58.25 for your ride on Gator, or take a re-ride. He didn’t flinch. Don’t those assholes know who they’re dealing with? He’s smarter than they are.
Valdiron’s 4-out-of-30 slump (did I hear that right?) wasn’t helped by Stanley Fatmax’s change of direction. He thoroughly rattled de Oliveira (who needed to be escorted out), and scored himself a 45.
4TH TIME IS NOT THE CHARM!
Western Hauler fell down on his side as Billy Robinson went flying. According to Ty Murray, this is the 4th time the bull has fallen. So either the bull has a drinking problem or there’s something wrong with him, and he needs to take time off.
ET TU, BRUTE?
Craig Hummer started complaining about Marchi being picky about how his bull is sitting. Well, Cali’s Cruel Intentions was a boring bull that netted him just 83, but he said the bull “Make me happy today.”
INCH BY INCH
When Renato’s bull did a squatty little spin, Nunes was offered a re-ride or 76 points. So he took the re-ride and was optimistic about his choice: “Why keep a small score when I can get a big one?” Are ya satisfied, re-ride fanatics? It was amazing that he stayed on the back of that bull, but it was all for a measly gain: 79.75.
Marchi has been #1 for 13 weeks. Deerango, however, didn’t help. The bull came out backwards, hipped himself, and generally did everything he could to make it rain orange flags.
Josh Faircloth had the worst Championship Round of everyone: his head smacked the bull, he was knocked out, and sustained a concussion.