Pretend this didn’t happen yet: Finals, Oct. 25

LIKE IT

  • J.W. Harris helping Jordan Hupp at the chute: pinching him by the scruff of the neck like a mama tiger does to a cub.
  • Jesse Byrne almost broke his face smiling during the Byrne boys’ double-act interview. Tanner had just scored 87.75 on Jo Jo, who was spinning so fast that from the aerial view, he looked like a windup toy. Even cuter: watching Jesse bouncing up and down while Tanner rode, in anticipation of running in for the defense.
  • Leah talking about Marchi walking down the corridor beating on his chest like Tarzan: “That’s what makes him so lovable.” Me Jane.

I’M JUST SAYIN’…

  • At the top of the broadcast was an interview with J.B. Mauney. Even when he hasn’t got a prayer of winning the world title, the PBR acts like he’s the most important story. Leah Garcia asked him what the best thing was that he could take away from the Finals, even though he can’t win the title. Regardless of the “I’m just letting it all hang out, gonna have fun” script, poor J.B. looked really droopy and sad.
  • Chase Outlaw was in the chute wrapping on Wolverine. And wrapping. And wrapping. “A lot of prep time, Shorty,” Craig noted. Shorty Gorham chimes in with, “He’s taking care of business, getting everything just right…” which apparently Silvano Alves isn’t allowed to do.
  • Matt Triplett and Delco: THAT was the Marquee Matchup! Score was 89.

TOO EMBARRASSING: HUMMER’S HERO WORSHIP

“J.B. Mauney—he’s doing everything right at the moment. That bruise showing. But he’s wearing it as a badge of honor.”

“History has shown, when Mauney sets his mind to something, watch out, world! But he knows that this time…” bla bla bla

“There isn’t enough fireworks or flame throwers in this area to compare to JB Mauney…” says Craig, projecting his hots for J.B.

HIGHLIGHT REEL

  • Tar Heel wasn’t just trying to throw himself up out of the chute like other bulls do—he literally was climbing out, up the rails, using his hooves like feet! Didn’t bode well for Josh Faircloth. Ty’s description of that out: “Worst and best ride he’s ever made. He’s not doing one thing right; he’s not even attempting to do anything right—the only thing he’s doing is to try to do everything to hang on.” Shades of the hanging-sideways JB/Code Blue ride, which I still can’t believe I was lucky enough to see in person. Josh’s post-ride comment: “When I tie my hand in there, I mean it.” 77.50 was his reward.
  • Fabiano Vieira—put on the clock, nursing a damaged shoulder, kept his free arm down, rode Hungry Eyes, landed on his feet, and scored 86.50. (The judges don’t hate Fabiano.) The funny thing: he kept his shoulder down through the whole ride, and even on his dismount—then used it by throwing his hat up in the air.
  • They put Alves on the clock (surprise, surprise) as he sat on Freakster. The shocker: the 86.25 score that put him back in 1st place in the world.

THE ALVES MOMENT

Liked the video of Silvano talking about how important it is to be here, for his family’s future. He said there’s more security, and he wants his children to be educated here. Adorable bit: his little son in a cowboy outfit, on a rocking horse, holding one arm in the air like he’s riding. “Good job, cowboy!” Dad says.

Leah asked Alves why J.B. won last year. Are you kidding?? You’re there in the thick of the “atmosphere,” and you’re in denial about what the judges have done for two years? Alves was too polite to tell the truth. He skirted the issue like a gentleman. When she asked whether he or João was going to win, he just started laughing. (A rare moment) 

PBR ran a mid-Finals website story on Alves that was quite revealing. Props to writer Justin Felisko for getting Silvano’s thinking into print. May I also say a huge HALLELUJAH for the PBR finally hiring a translator: Miriaham Contreras. (I guess they finally had to admit that the Killer Bs are here to stay.) Now we can hear what he really said. I quote from the article, for the Alves Haters Brigade: 

Alves has always looked at the bigger picture when it comes to the re-ride scenario. He is focused on winning a gold buckle and the World Finals event title.

“It is in the moment. It is not an overall plan,” Alves said. “If I see the points and there is a certain amount of points I need, I am going to give it my all. I risk losing points if I take a re-ride and don’t ride. Then I lose points for the event average.”

“Sometimes the judging affects the re-ride situation,” Alves said before the start of the Finals. “The re-ride (bull) may be a bad one, or it might be a good one. I know sometimes they are an 84-point ride, but I also know that sometimes with the re-ride situation and me, the judges may give me a 79 instead of an 80-something. I don’t want the judges to help me. I just want them to be fair.” 

Nine-time World Champion Ty Murray, PBR Director of Livestock Cody Lambert and two-time World Champion Justin McBride all agreed that Alves was given to low of a score. [Editorial note: correct English is, “too low a score.]

“I feel like the judges got it wrong,” Murray said. “He did try to pick the easiest bull in the round and that is why he was on the bull that had the weakest out.” [Editorial comment: Shut up, Ty. You’re just plain insulting.]

Later in the article:

“He is in the driver’s seat,” Murray said. “He is using the current system perfectly. Anything he draws, I feel like he is going to ride. I’ve seen him ride bulls before that give others hell and he makes them look easy.” [Editorial comment: OMG! Ty continually bitches about Silvano’s strategy and complains that he picks easy bulls, and then he says this?? Is the man schizophrenic??]

“There is nothing wrong with this guy riding,” McBride said. “He is right on track with his game plan and his strategy. He is going to knock them all down and I think he is going to be the World Champion.”

Okay, that’s the print version. During the broadcast, McBride said Silvano always picks from the bottom of the pen, the weaker bulls—then had to scramble to retract his huge insult to the stock contractors: “but that’s not the case tonight, because of the caliber of the bulls.”

“If you pick ’em, you’re s’posed to ride ‘em,” says J.W. Hart. But when Alves does that, he’s picking “weak” bulls, and he’s “chicken.” Right?

“It’s been 24 hours when a lot of people have questioned Silvano,” says Craig the genius. Questioned?? The word is crucified. And then this forehead-smacker: “If it weren’t for J.B.’s marvelous run last year, this guy would already have three world championships,” says Craig. “If J.B. hadn’t got on the roll of all rolls last year, Silvano may have been on his way to his fourth world championship,” says Ty. %#@$%^&*! You mean if it weren’t for the judges’ “marvelous run” last year! If Alves hadn’t constantly been put on the clock, harassed, and underscored, he would have 3 trophies. As far as a lot of us are concerned, Silvano DID win his third world championship.

Here’s the corker: “I feel dirty about this, but I’m gonna get on the Silvano bandwagon,” says Cody Lambert, flipflopping again.

BUILT-FORD-TOUGH BULL
Long John caused me a big WOW—he was powerful, vertical, and scored a 47.25. He’s the same one that hammered J.W. Harris in Springfield a couple of months ago when J.W. had the nerve to ride him for 87.50. 

NOT-SO-TOUGH BULL:
Lachlan Richardson scored on Comfortably Numb, then both of them ended up rollin’ and tumblin’ on the dirt. Richardson came out of it with a bloody face, but the bull would’ve stayed like a turtle on its back, legs flailing, if it weren’t for Shorty, who righted it.

FASHION DISASTER ALERT
Brady Sims shed his apple green chaps, courtesy of Half Time, and made his escape dragging them behind, wrapped around one ankle.

I WISH TO GOD TY WOULD SHUT UP FOR EVEN JUST FIVE SECONDS!!
I wrote that note before the round was even half over.
One gem to emerge from his pie hole: “If you come to the World Finals a few times, you’re gonna see every side of the coin.” He apparently thinks we use 3-D quarters.
Another brain fart: “Here’s what I think about Silvano…I feel like Silvano can ride any bull here,” he says, contradicting his accusations of Alves picking easy bulls or making a bull look easy.

CAN’T STAND IT!!

  • In Round 1 Robson Palermo got stepped on, and acquired a sprained ankle. In this round, Hot Iron did the damage. Poor Robson: thrown off, crumpled over, can’t stand up straight without help—and Ty’s babbling again about Robson not trusting his shoulder. Dude, the guy can’t walk, and he CAN’T lift his shoulder—it’s not like he isn’t trying!
  • “Many are calling this the Marquee Matchup,” says Craig, salivating over JB Mauney vs. Bruiser. Oh really? Who are the “many”? You? 82.25 would move Mauney to the lead, so of course all he has to do is stay on, and gets rewarded with 93.25. Honest to god, Frank Newsom was kissing Mauney out on the dirt.
  • JB clonked his face against the bull, got tossed off, then fell flat. As Leah interviewed him, a big raw red bruise was already showing on his right cheekbone. He kinda wasn’t making total sense, but I guess that’s what happens when your brains make contact with a bull’s skull. Craig can’t wait to start blithering about his mancrush again: “Let’s go back to JB Mauney… it’s Mauney that sends the message,” even while Stetson Lawrence comes out of the chute. Two words for J.B.: HEL-MET!
  • “You can never have enough or win enough,” is how The Bummer imagines Silvano’s mindset. The thing is, nobody’s heard him say anything like that.
  • Ty once again was yammering about that “mental block” Marchi has about riding bulls away from his hand: “and if he doesn’t fix it, he’s a 50% bull rider.” I guess Ty hasn’t noticed that he’s still in the world’s top 10.

YUP
Says J.W. Hart about Gage Gay, “He’s got a whole lot of confidence; he ain’t afraid to tell you how good he is, either, but he’s gotta take care of business first, then do the talking.” 

NITWITTICISMS, BY “NONE-OTHER-THAN” THE HUMMER BUMMER
“Wolverine baring all his claws.”
“Wagon Wheel didn’t need many turns before Resende touches ground.”
“Dollar Hunt has an out that makes him look like a hundred dollar bill.”
“Set ‘em Up Joe tried to set up the Brazilian, but Eduardo wasn’t biting.”
Re Muddy Smile: “We will see who’s smiling after this matchup.”
“J.B. takes the pop, but says to Bruiser, I’m gonna take the final blow.”

TALKING DIRTY
“The direction change was enough to get Marchi off… He immediately gets stiff… starts straining.” I don’t have to tell you who said that, do I?

WHAT DIDJA EXPECT?
The judges managed to move J.B. up to #2 in the world behind Alves, by making him win Round 4 with that 93.25. See, they could afford to bestow the 86.25 on Silvano because they’d already showered Mauney with that 93.25, guaranteeing the round win. The only rider the judges would score higher is Chris Shivers.

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About Bull Riding Marketing

Creative services, marketing and public relations professional from entertainment industry background. Published in magazines and newspapers worldwide. I believe bull riders are the new rock stars.
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